Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> I never learn
Post Info TOPIC: I never learn
lookingup


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1008
Date:
I never learn
Permalink  

I guess I'm a gotten for punishment Im home from vacationing,and my a bf calls me 3 days later and says why didn't you call me and let me know you were home ,I told him it didn't matter,he pleaded with me to let him come to my home and I give in and said come on over well he acted NORMAL for a little while then his sick side started kicking in he had invited me to go out to eat and he got a ph,call said he be back in a min,he came back in a min,then he said he asked me to borrow my car and I said no you use your own car he started to plead with me saying he was just going down the road and back I said noo use your own he said he be back I told him I was leaveing going to my friends I haven't seen or heard from him since this is the next day hish. but I know there were other ppl that had a ph. for him to use to call me,he was acting really weird.i waited for him to get out of my driveway and I left to go visit my friend .today I'm getting all his things he has left here and putting it all outside my home for him toick up.and leave ,and leave me alone I'm sooo tired of that crap,but he did soo try,but he couldn't act right not even for a little while.it seems he is getting worsen with his desease.but as for today I'm free from it all and hope to stay free and put of it for good...any esh is welcome ,,,,love you all for your past esh,,,hugs lookingup ,,,nodisbelief



__________________

Do the next right thing~

ONE DAY AT A TIME!

 

 
Cathyinaz


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3026
Date:
Permalink  

I'm sorry Lookinup

We try and try to make things right but instead we get disappointment. I can remember doing so many things, letting myself be used in hopes of a change. Come to find out it was for what does HE need and how can he get it from me. If I didn't let it happen he was gone. I'm talking about my son but it's the same thing in my book. A's can manipulate with the best of them and can hurt you deep if you let it.

Nothing changes until we change (((( hugs ))))






__________________

 Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth

Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.

 
Debilyn


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3653
Date:
Permalink  

Well it's hard for us to believe how very sick they are! You did great using the "no" word.

I am happy for you as  you sound like you are really ready to let him go and you are moving on. Maybe you know someone who's place you would take his stuff to so he does not come over?

ONE day at a time.

You are right, the disease does tear them down as time goes on. Our bodies are not meant to be saturated with alcohol or other drugs. It is killing them slowly. We do not have to stick around and watch it.

I am older so my A's are too. It makes me so sad as there are two i would like to see how they are. But I won't bother as I know they are wet brained.

Hugs hon, you are doing great and heading on to serenity!

 



__________________

Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

       http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html            Or call: 1-888-4alanon
karma13


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 326
Date:
Permalink  

Nice job saying No and sticking to your boundary :) you are doing great!!!!
Hugs :)

__________________

I needed these behaviors in my past they helped me survive I'm finding new and better ways to not just survive but thrive 
grateful2be


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:
Permalink  

In the work I've done, I know people want to use other people's phones and cars to make drug deals without being affected by any fallout. Multiple phone numbers in a short amount of time is usually indicative of drug deals, too. Good you said no to letting him use your car or phone. What I see in his "trying" was the disease doing what it does and going for what it really wants. I know you've received lots of suggestions on other posts for helping yourself move on from what is a dangerous situation for you given the facts about his actions as you've stated before. I'll just say that you do know how to listen to your intuition and acting on it when push comes to shove and you're sensing something is wrong and the word "no" is necessary.



-- Edited by grateful2be on Tuesday 1st of July 2014 11:29:38 AM

__________________

"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig
KennyFenderjazz


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1896
Date:
Permalink  

Lookingup,

If you call what you did not learning, then go do some more not learning, because you are doing great!. Sticking to your boundaries. Anybody that calls you innocently, then suddenly wants to use your phone and your car, in my book they are being extremely manipulative and nobody deserves that kind of treatment.

Kenny

__________________
hotrod


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 17196
Date:
Permalink  

Looking up good job Please search our some alanon face to face meetings and attend The support and understanding that you will receive will be so very beneficial.

__________________
Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> I never learn