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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> A new way to look at anxiety ..
Post Info TOPIC: A new way to look at anxiety ..
SerenityRUS


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A new way to look at anxiety ..
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I had a great therapy appointment today and I really needed it and something that he said that really struck me was about anxiety and what part it plays in terms of for me why I had basically what he classified as a mini panic attack recently that really really threw me .. I am really not used to feeling things to clearly and it will leave me off balance because all of a sudden I'm feeling things I have ignored or avoided for so long that it is a powerful feeling.  Normally I look at anxiety as fear .. the fear of what is what really had me perplexed this last go around.  I am frustrated with myself in terms of WHY NOW?  I mean maybe why not now is the better way to go on that issue.  I had a good laugh over some of the things that have happened and just really kind of WTH over others. 

Anyway, .. I had a point .. lol .. the point being he looked at me and said .. you realize that anxiety is the fear of the unknown future right?  I would expect because it is normal and healthy to feel fear about the unknown .. what are you going to do about the things you can change and what you can't change is based upon how you are going to react to what is happening.  Now .. I paraphrased the last statement .. however going back to the original thing .. anxiety is fear of the future.  DUH .. like I'm not a major control freak right?  I don't itch to predict the future on every level so I can know the right decision to make (because I am lazy and I would prefer to avoid learning hard lessons) the easiest way possible .. ie .. the perfect decision.  The least amount of conflict in ANY given situation. 

Light bulb moment to say the least .. I know he must have said this to me before and I forgot .. LOL .. like I haven't slept sense then.  The other thing he said that made me feel good is .. considering what you are dealing with on pretty much a weekly daily basis .. you truly are doing very, very well.  So try and relax as much as possible and keep doing the next right thing which for me means .. keeping up my spiritual fitness and now I'm going to be incorporating physical fitness in as well.  I think it's beyond time to get moving on that issue .. I do need to loose some weight and get myself healthier than I am now.  The scary thing is the idea of my stbax getting custody of the kids all because I didn't take care of me. 

So .. trying like crazy to let go of fear of the unknown and my wanting to predict the future. 

Hugs S :)  

 



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Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism.  If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do "faith". - Brene Brown

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grateful2be


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If I focus on my body, my breathing, where my body is placed in a room, and what I see, hear or smell, I become fully present to what is and fear of the future (which for me can also be "stuckness in the past") evaporates. I notice I am fine and fully supported in my existence. And whatever thoughts were mine that led to the anxiety are now gone and I can't even remember what they were. At other times, when the anxiety produces what I can only describe as a sensation of my stomach falling and a vast emptiness(usually after I go to bed occasionally), I ask my HP to fill the emptiness with its Presence and soon after that, I fall asleep.

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"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig
PP


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I have periods of anxiety that seem to just come out of nowhere, I often feel them when I am lying in bed.  Sometimes I can pinpoint the causes and other times I can't.  I, too, focus on my breathing and do what you are doing, taking the best possible care of me that I know to do in the present moment.  You are doing great, Serenity and I appreciate hearing the wisdom of your therapist.



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Paula
Breakingfree


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It sounds like you are working a good program of taking care of you and figuring out your needs. Sending you love and support!

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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree

Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666

" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."

"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
Jerry F


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Good post which brings up looking at the acronym for fear that says "False Evidence Appearing Real".   My mind tricks me...showing me pictures or talking about events that have not happened and manipulating them in a way that I see "real" probabilities and react as if its happening.   Try rolling that around in your belief system for a while and see if it helps.  When I know that the evidence for my anxiety is not real I stop the fixation of it and let it pass out into the atmosphere.   ((((hugs)))) smile



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ilovedogs


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Exercise is so important to me and my program, even if it's just stretching while I'm sitting in a chair. It helps me focus on my breathing and makes me feel more alive. You are doing well, SRus, and you are doing a great job being mom to your kids. We all have anxiety, I think that's normal after what many of us have lived with or dealt with in our lives. I know that I am able to tell myself that 'this too shall pass' and I let it go over me and through me and I just try to breathe with it. Hugs!!

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Debilyn


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I love your posts!

Ok I invite you to think of being healthy and stay off the scale. I do so much better going by my cloths and how i feel.

Myself I am a vegan, do not eat dairy either. Took me a long time to get where all my food is healthy.I am getting healed from knee surgery to start walking again.

I don't care what I weigh. for one thing muscle weighs more than fat! You will feel better if you eat right. Do you know how? Some people are never taught to.

Nothing out of a box.Frozen things are fresher than produce at a grocery store.but get both.

If you want some ideas pm me. NO dairy there are such great non dairy things. Ice cream? I make the best non dairy ice cream with coconut milk and other stuff.

If you want to go no meat, there are soooo many alternatives.Walking is cheap,fun and you can start a block at a time if you want to.

cloths, wear what fits. It feels better and you look better.

this goal is so great when you reach it and it is just your way of life. I am NOT skinny! I doubt my tummy will ever go away, babies surgeries...ugh I don't care anymore. I feel healthy and have pinkness! lol

I do love desserts so I make healthy ones. If i want a candy bar I get ONE. I eat low to no fat. Now things that are fat turn me off with that greasy feeling in mymouth.

anyway I liked reading how you want to work on you  pretty lady! love!



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hotrod


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Serenity I found that working Step 3 through 11 really helped me to learn to trust HP completely and to know deep within that no matter what happens I will be given the "power "to carry it out. Step 11 assures me of this, I may not like what I am given, but I will be and have been given the courage, serenity and wisdom to walk through it.

Keep working your program you are doing fine.

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

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