The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I am in recovery, working my program , each day at a timesometimes i progress, sometimes I regress. I am learning that this too is normal process.
What I mostly am in recovery is curious. And so I keep an open mind and look for new things to learn, always with a 'why not' in my head. Everything and anything that helps me know more about myself is great. So I try out many many things. This weekend I attended a clown workshop. oh that was so much fun. it's like a modified version of Al Anonlolhard to believe , but it is serious personal development stuff. The clown is a genuine being. He tries to overcome his ego, trying not to take himself too serious while still acknowledging all of his emotions. So we made many exercises in practice, learning to show emotions, anger, sadness, happiness, astonishment, we were invited to get the childhood feeling back of being surprised at the look at everything, and communicating without boundaries. At the end of the first day after a lot of practical exercises with our self, our room, our colleagues, we then were to be born as a clown: with putting up the red nose, of course. It's not just a nose. It's an identity of our own clown that sits inside of us, our child, our human being with feeling. Each clown has a different personality, but it is sincere, whatever it is. the moment you put on the nose, is a magical moment. You feel given the permission to be silly, astonished, careful, joking, without society's boundaries. You can let go, and lightness fills you, for you can just be with the spontaneous feelings, in the moment, in the present. The nose gives you full permission.as a clown no big expectations are lying on you, or so it feels. I always think of myself as ashy person, I always wished I was able to play theatre but was always too shy to perform n stage. Clowning is different, for I don't have to perform. I don't have to play a role. I can actually be myself, with feelings, in an exaggerated manner, which makes them automatically smaller in emotion, for it allows you not to take them so seriously. Exaggerating allows you to look at them and put them in humor and acceptance becomes easier.
i love my clown, for he is sensitive but strong, he is not so much scared as I am at times, he is more independent. even though he loves his audience, he is also very happy with who he is, for his imagination and for being able to share it with the people. Just a little red nose, which I even can just imagine in my head, and maybe relating to others will be a bit more easier at times. acknowledging feeling, without drowning in it.
For example, I get the silent treatment from 3 important people in my life. It is not a nice way to be treated with, for it is mean, manipulative, quite harmful. Well I decided now, to put on my 'red nose' and be a clown about it. I see the other, I react to it with my own feeling, which is of course hurt , a bit of anger and disappointment, and sadness, then I also feel I have some compassion for the other, as a clown, as i imagine he/she must be struggling in pain themselves, I feel that and then I walk away, as a clown, for something else has caught my attention to wonder about, since everything in life is a little magic, for the clown.
So that was a wonderful weekend, which lightened up my life a bit. I wanted to share with you, maybe one of you gets the chance to try it out too, or be curious about anything else out there that calls your personal attention.
It's not at all about making fun of the situation or the personit's actually about acknowledging what's there, being in present and trying to become lighter about it. love the lesson. and of course it's practice
I'm so glad you did something new just for you and found the experience to be educational, spontaneous and fun for you. I, too, did clowning at some point in my life. I know how much goes into even creating a face that cannot be like anybody else's face and a costume that fits the type of clown you want to be. It is a fascinating way to watch yourself - outside yourself - and others' reaction to you without reacting. Although I was primarily a character clown and sometimes a silent clown depending on what our troupe needed to do with the scripts we wrote, I found it to be an interesting way to interact as both an observer and as a participant without ever being known on the streets once I removed the makeup, costume and shoes.
Please keep us posted on your experiences in clowning if you'd like. You're the only other person I've known in Al-Anon who has done clowning as an exercise in mindful spontaneity if that is what you were describing? You might meet some really interesting folks, too. Clowns are sometimes in a league of their own in my experience. My favorite are those who know what pressure points to touch on arthritic hands in nursing homes to relieve pain and stiffness in just a simple, soft handshake and Pierrot mimes. Do you have favorites?
Once again, I'm delighted for you. It is so much fun to create your own clown personality and I'm amazed at how much you developed in just one workshop.
PS. Clowning was NOT something I wanted to do and it was the vehicle my HP used to get me to where I was to be and where I stayed for almost 30 years. Maybe your clowning will bring you to a place and to a life's purpose that you don't know lies ahead that will be the most satisfying thing you've ever experienced so far in life?
-- Edited by grateful2be on Sunday 11th of May 2014 10:34:30 PM
-- Edited by grateful2be on Sunday 11th of May 2014 10:37:49 PM
-- Edited by grateful2be on Monday 12th of May 2014 09:31:36 PM
oh that was so much fun. it's like a modified version of Al Anonlolhard to believe , but it is serious personal development stuff. The clown is a genuine being. He tries to overcome his ego, trying not to take himself too serious while still acknowledging all of his emotions. So we made many exercises in practice, learning to show emotions, anger, sadness, happiness, astonishment, we were invited to get the childhood feeling back of being surprised at the look at everything, and communicating without boundaries. At the end of the first day after a lot of practical exercises with our self, our room, our colleagues, we then were to be born as a clown: with putting up the red nose, of course. It's not just a nose. It's an identity of our own clown that sits inside of us, our child, our human being with feeling. Each clown has a different personality, but it is sincere, whatever it is. the moment you put on the nose, is a magical moment. You feel given the permission to be silly, astonished, careful, joking, without society's boundaries. You can let go, and lightness fills you, for you can just be with the spontaneous feelings, in the moment, in the present. The nose gives you full permission.as a clown no big expectations are lying on you, or so it feels. I always think of myself as ashy person, I always wished I was able to play theatre but was always too shy to perform n stage. Clowning is different, for I don't have to perform. I don't have to play a role. I can actually be myself, with feelings, in an exaggerated manner, which makes them automatically smaller in emotion, for it allows you not to take them so seriously. Exaggerating allows you to look at them and put them in humor and acceptance becomes easier.