Without going into a lot of detail, I wasn't always cute and adorable like I am now. When I was in relationships I took hostages. Everything was about me and you were all out to get me. Through the twelve steps I learned that most of what I thought about myself about god and about the people around me was a distorted perception of reality. I have a son who by some miracle still allows me in his life. My son has a daughter who until a few years ago I didn't even know. I knew she existed but I wasn't able to be in her life. One day she sent me a friend request through fake book. I wanted to explain why things were the way they were. So I wrote her a letter. I had a lot to tell her so the one letter became two letters and the two became four and so on until I had about ten letters. I never mailed any of them. We got to know each the old fashioned way, by going for ice cream and walks on the beach and talking. She's a very interesting person and she thinks I am, too.

Last year I re-read the letters and noticed that they formed a comical autobiography of my life. So I edited some of them, added a few, and turned them into a set of e-books. Someday I'll let you read them.

I think the moral of the story is that there is hope. I am a guy who lost everything and everyone. Then, I went into recovery for both my own alcoholism and for theirs too and slowly my life got better. I didn't get back everything or everyone that I lost. But, my higher power replaced what couldn't be returned and often the new things and the new people were better than the ones I previously had. I just wanted to share that. Who knows? maybe someone needed to hear it or maybe I just needed to say it. Either way, a miracle happens.

To the new people. Don't give up.