Tired - Al-Anon Family Group

Cathyinaz · ~*Service Worker*~

Tired

KennyFenderjazz · ~*Service Worker*~

I don't have much of the S to share, I felt the same way yesterday. Then the wind started blowing (50 mph gusts) so I couldn't sleep. So now I'm groggy at work today, but at least mentally a bit better.

Gotta do my step work. Gotta find a sponsor. Will go to a new meeting this week to broaden the prospective pool.

Peace
Kenny

grateful2be · ~*Service Worker*~

I've felt that way, Cathy, at times. I've shared it with my HP and have also asked to be shown what is next for me to be or to do. I've been surprised sometimes by the response I've received - one was to become a grandmother at a time I least expected it which became one of the greatest joys of my life. My own experience has been when I get to those places, its time to practice Step 3 and/or Step 11 in the form best suited to me. Reminding myself "This, too, shall pass," has also been a help to me on those down days. Hugs, sister. Perhaps a big happy surprise or event is on the horizon for you.

-- Edited by grateful2be on Monday 27th of January 2014 10:23:27 AM

tiredtonite · Veteran Member

Hi Cathy,

I think we've all been there. I was in that place too for awhile yesterday morning and then it lifted. There's so much that's out of our control and at times letting go can feel very hard if I can't stop thinking about something that's worrying me. Aside from the obvious tools like reading my program books, bringing my body to a meeting and my mind following or calling somebody in the program... I've tried to put music on at home that lifts my spirits rather than listening to sad songs that I might relate to but tend to put me in a funk even more. If I'm down so low that putting on "happy" music feels impossible, I cry it out, pray and even allow myself more sleep if I feel drained. Sometimes more rest is just what's needed so I let go. I've found that the down feelings pass after allowing myself to feel it and letting go by resting. Journalling also helps me if I can't sleep or the dreaded gratitude list when I'm having trouble thinking of things to be grateful for. The list usually begins begrudgingly with something like... I'm grateful for this pen to write my list but it improves as I go along Hope you're spirits begin to lift from reading the responses. Sorry you're having a tough day (((cathy))) TT

Jill · ~*Service Worker*~

Oh yes I know that one, too.
These have been helpful for me: saying the serenity prayer, getting some sunshine (I also think this helps me sleep, giving me a much better day tomorrow), singing out loud for about 10 minutes, petting my pet, walking enough so I can still talk but can't sustain a musical phrase for about 20 - 30 minutes, and cutting down on the refined sugar.
Feeling better physically makes it so much easier to dig into my AlAnon toolbox. I need that to get in the right head.

Jerry F · ~*Service Worker*~

Sis...when I get like that I stop "working" on me and go relaxing on me. I believe I get like that from "working" on my mind and emotions and spirits to hard. Physically it causes me to shut down too. Take care of Cathy. ((((hugs)))) smile

ClearTheFog · Senior Member

Hugs, Cathy. This too shall pass. In my experience with myself, the usual main culprits for me not wanting my life any more and secretly wishing it were all over (terrible, I know), are either lack of exercise (I need a lot of it per week), or me not feeling like my life is my own to truly do with it as I see fit. This second one is so sneaky. It sneaks in there when I'm not paying attention. I usually at that point ask myself "Ok so what would you do with your day, if it were 100% up to you? If you were 100% free to do whatever you wanted to do?".

I think a lot of us women, at least middle aged and older, were raised during times where men were encouraged to be brave enough to go out and get what they wanted out of life, kind of grabbing what they wanted to out of life, and women kinda got the message via role models (parents) that we were only there to serve others, or to make a nice home/launching pad for others, and not to go after what we wanted. We are only valuable if we are 'nice' and compliant with what OTHER people want. Those messages that I got when I was growing up tend to sneak back in and imprison me again if I don't watch it. It's usually not until I'm deep in the depression again that I realize this lie has grabbed hold of my brain and is squeezing the life out of it.

So I guess to summarize, it's whenever I feel like my life is not my own. It's a miserable place to be.

I hope you feel better soon!

-- Edited by ClearTheFog on Monday 27th of January 2014 12:09:46 PM

ilovedogs · ~*Service Worker*~

Hugs Cathy, I was having a very depressed day yesterday, too! I completely understand. I posted on another board that I was just weary. Glad that today you are ok. Let me know if you ever want to get together, I'm just down the highway from you!

Gaby · Senior Member

I can relate to these feelings too. I am having one of those mornings, but I'm praying through it. I have to allow my HP to pull me through. I pray we all have peace. We deserve to be happy regardless what is put in front of us.. God bless..

AngelicH57 · Senior Member

{{{{{Cathy}}}}}

el-cee · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi Cathy, thanks for the honest share, it takes guts to reveal these days that we all have or have had. When I feel down I know what works for me, like, reading my books, picking up the phone and talking to someone from my meetings, sharing here, writing a gratitude list, I was on an online meeting and someone suggested a gratitude list using the alphabet, Ive never heard of that one before.

Sometimes though I have noticed lately that I can resist doing what is good for me and will give me relief, its like I become comfortable resorting to my default mode of misery. I have got to fight these feelings and sometimes its tiring fighting and giving in and having the miserable day may be part of recovery too. Glad your okay now.x

Cathyinaz · ~*Service Worker*~

Thank you all.... I had a OK day at work because I was so busy didn't have time to think to much. I think one of my problems is

I'm way overweight and no exercise is the makings of a bad combination. I need to get out in the sun......no sun....no growth.

el-cee · ~*Service Worker*~

No sun, no growth, dont say that Cathy. Where I am there has been no daylight for about 3 or 4 months now. Well, what I mean is I go to work in the dark and I come home in the dark.lol. when it is light its not really light, its like a constant dusk. Sun!!! what does that look like????

grateful2be · ~*Service Worker*~

Send el-cee a picture, Cathy. Maybe one a day from happy sun country will help elcee and give you a new hobby? Be sure to include the head wrap picture, too? (((C))) Glad you're feeling better.

Jen61 · ~*Service Worker*~

I feel the same way at times. The day in and day out whole situation is hard. I pray more and just always home the next day will be better. Prayers and good thoughts are being sent your way.

maryanne · Member

Everyone had such good ideas. I just wanted to say that taking a walk helps. I also talk to my HP. Has someone else said this too shall pass. HUGS.

oldergal · Senior Member

Cathy, you are in for a change now...your son is not around to worry about and that's what you were doing 80% of the time, so now you are saying to yourself "whats next" and you are not coming up with answers. Its time to discover a whole new you, one that you have always wanted to be. Consider it an adventure! Keep it simple, don't expect big, big changes right away, exercise is a good place to start. Maybe you want to start saving to travel?, maybe you want to look into Road Scholars, they are people your age who travel all over the country and world. Let your SO know your next venture, he can either join you or you can take off by yourself. You may be tired because you are tired of working everyday year after year, maybe retirement. Sounds like you need a change, meet new people or change your environment for a while. The world is wide open to you, you just have to use your imagination......Sincerely OG

Breakingfree · ~*Service Worker*~

Get out in the sun and blossom the way you have here at MIP! It is easy to le the negative pull us under, but remember who you are, You are so worth more! I am going to try to share a link to a song that helps me when I am down. It's by tenth avenue north, You Are More! copy and paste this link in your browser and it should get you to it. Sending you much love, prayers and support always! www.youtube.com/watch

mm830 · Senior Member

Sometimes you are just so depleted your mind and body need the low point to catch up. Also you were sick and the cats, you have been under almost constant stress for some time now. Please be extra gentle to yourself. If you like walking its beautiful out lately, even ten minutes would probably make ypu feel a bit better. Hugs Cathy feel better, we love you.

SerenityRUS · ~*Service Worker*~

I can completely relate .. to much is to much and that's ok. I do gratitude lists and it helps to get outside of myself. I agree that after so much constant stress and there is a lull after the storm so to speak .. it's hard to be on land after getting knocked around at sea for so long. I feel that way after court dates. My brain kind of takes s big breath and says ok .. ugh .. time to breathe .. I sui think those are moments of healing and moving into a new level .. falling down the rabbit hole ... I always feel like Alice in that regard. You stated yourself you don't feel suicidal .. just tired .. time for self care and be gentle with you big time Sis. Hugs ..

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