The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I get a call today this morning from our local hospital stating that my son was there getting ready to get discharged and wanted me to go get him to drive him to our local mental health. I told the nurse if he is already there and he is thinking of suicide then you guys should transport him. Well then she said he told the doctor he was not going to kill himself but yet he told the cops he was. So again I thought to myself I'm not falling for his manipulation.. I'm tired I'm hurt but now I'm getting to a point where I am learning his games and I won't do this to me. So I told the nurse you can have him call me and I will tell him the same.. She said the security officer told her that me son did ask for the phone but then said never mind. So I made it through my day at work and will go to my part-time job also. My son had a choice again to get mental help. N he didn't go. That would have been a start if he truly wanted it. Right? I felt god put me in my place and said no your not going to his rescue!! It was tough.. I have never said NO !! To my son. But I had to.. God will watch over him because I know as of this morning he was ok. I pray I'm doing as I should be. Thank you all for your strength .. I needed a reality check. I need to think of me. N protect me n my family that I have. But I will always love and pray for my son. Any words would be appreciated.. Thank you
You have come so far. I believe you did the right thing for both yourself and your son. It sure isn't easy but as we know, helping only keeps them in their disease. Stay strong! I will be praying that something clicks for him and he seeks recovery.
Thank you ladies.. I have to work on me.. Because right now my son is sick and is only looking for his next way to try to control me with his pity.. He knows there is help out there if he truly wants it. N I want help for me real bad !!
That had to be very hard for you, but I think you made the right choice too. Let go and let God, you have done all you can now your son has to make his choices and live with the results. Good job. You will be in my prayers.
I'm so glad you didn't go. Your son can get all the help he needs if that's what he chooses. He doesn't need mom to do it. This time is different and he will realize it. It's either sink or swim.
You love your son dearly I know Gaby...so this is a necessary step to give him the best chance to someday have a life.
Good job my friend.....
Prayers are with you and your son....you are not alone.
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Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth
Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.
This a great step in taking care of you and not getting sucked into the drama. Watching things unfold from the sidelines is still tough, but easier than being in the middle of the storm.
((((Gaby))))...Letting God have him and stepping out of the way of interference is about courage or ...fear that has said its prayers. You're not alone girl...we stand with you right behind your Higher Power.
Sounds like you were being led by your higher power. You were confident in your decision. The first time we say no to enabling is the toughest but it does get easier with each time we stand up for ourselves. Your son was not alone when you received that call. Just like you, he has his own higher power and was among medical staff who could aid him as well if he expressed willingness. You deserve serenity as you begin the new year. Thanks for sharing your progress. Prayers for you and your family for health, serenity and sobriety in the new year. TT
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
Sometimes taking care of ourselves isn't easy. I'm glad that you were able to enforce a boundary that helps you practice good self care. Great working the program!
A reality check is that sometimes we need to tell our children "no". They may not like it but they do need to hear it. It's not always easy being a parent, but we do the best we can.
Gaby, that was difficult but you did the right thing in my opinion. I'm grateful to you for showing relatively new alanon-ers like me that tough choices work. Thank you.
wow! (((Hugs))) Gaby, that was hard. Great example of how you can do it, with the strength you've gained in these rooms. Keep coming back. Keep up the good work. Thank you so much for sharing. It is so helpful!!
