Feeling vulnerable - Al-Anon Family Group

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

Feeling vulnerable

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Dear Paula

I am glad you are safe and that you had the courage to stay in the moment and connect with another who could" hear" you and respond.

Good work.

Prayers of gratitiude for your safety

Jen61 · ~*Service Worker*~

I feel your gut feeling is usually right on. Thank god the lady came back into the store. You take care.

grateful2be · ~*Service Worker*~

Paula: I am glad that you are safe and that you listened to your instinctual self. I'm also glad there was someone outside the store courageous enough to come back into it. I hope you will not be working alone in the store again. I am fairly certain the person or persons will return. I've had several experiences of similar things in the past few years. Part of it I chalk up to being a woman. Part of it I chalk up to being an older woman. We do become more vulnerable to the eyes of predators looking for a fix. I never see those occurrences as accidents but as moments of grace. To me, it is serendipitous. An opportunity for me to pray for the person who is behaving in a subhuman manner and to turn them in, too, or to at least give their description to the police. The rest of it I believe to be in God's hands, but I do what I can to hold the person accountable while at the same time praying for their well -being and mine. Regardless of how I see it, you are shaken up and with good reason. I'm with Betty. Prayers of gratitude for your safety. Prayers of release for the thieve(s). Prayers of blessings for the gal who just happened to be outside at the time you needed her and willingly walked back into the store. Thank you, God, for sending the right woman at the right time with the right attitude to be there with my friend.

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

Thank you Betty and Jen. It is comforting to have your responses. I wasn't sure I would be able to sleep, but

I believe i will.

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

Thank you, grateful.

neshema2 · ~*Service Worker*~

I am writing this to help me connect with me feelings, to acknowledge how vulnerable I feel. i learned very well through the years to dismiss, minimize and deny potentially harmful and blatantly harmful situations. I was not and am not reckless, just downright stupid at times. This is not self deprecation, it is truth. Maybe it came from not holding my life sacred; not having a reverence for my life. My life is sacred and it can count on me to stay alert to danger and take the right action on my behalf. Thanks for listening.

***************************
(((((((((((((((((((((((Paula))))))))))))))))))))))

OMG, sweetie, I am sooo grateful that I logged on and saw this...have to admit, it shook me up, reading it, but I am sooo glad that you are "with your feelings" and your instincts that you did NOT ignore this and you played it REAL smart...engaging him in conversation, makes you real to him, and thus less desireable as a victim and that you "eyed" that lady and she had sense enough to come back in......

WOW!!!! breathe deep......and tell yourself that you are SAFE now and OK now and allow the adrenalin to pass through you...rub your upper legs and arms and kinda embrace yourself so you can feel safer, grounded..........i "hurry" up those adrenalin rushes from my ptsd by doing some strength exercises, or aerobics, anything to burn it off as i drink more water to flush out the toxic hormones my body creates when under stress.......your hippo campus was FLOODED w/hormones as you were in danger and you sensed it, but WOW....U did GREAT , keeping it together , and not losing your cool and thus, preventing something real bad

I think I would have a chat w/owner if there is not proper safety devices for workers after dark in stores......

Thank you creator that our Paula is OK.....

mm830 · Senior Member

Very glad you are safe, amazing how our instincts guide us. Please take extra care talk to the store owner to see what can be done to increase security. I am so glad you are okay.

grateful2be · ~*Service Worker*~

A can of wasp spray is a great protective device - even from 20' away - straight to the eyes.

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

Thank you neshema and mm....

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

Grateful....so wise and gritty! I love it.

bud · ~*Service Worker*~

((Paula))

I'm so glad you trusted your instinct and kept yourself safe. I know I would feel rattled and vulnerable even after knowing that it's over and I'm unharmed. Be kind to yourself and give yourself credit for taking good care of you.

If I understand correctly, I can relate to the vulnerability of feeling excessively naive (aka stupid

). I have been asking myself what that is. I, too, have been well trained to dismiss and minimize my feelings and needs. So, for me, it is a weakness that I can practice strengthening as I stay connected to my feelings and take actions that are true to myself. The self awareness allows me to better understand and keep to my side of the street and not get overly involved with things that don't concern me. (Sometimes it does feel wiser to know myself- my truth- and simply observe others.)

I don't see this, however, as a connection to your recent experience other than the vulnerable feelings this caused and an adjustment to the newer feelings of taking care of yourself. You acted swiftly and smartly.

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

aww Take care, Paula... focussing on your instincts was so good... please, please higher power... take care of our sister...!

SerenityRUS · ~*Service Worker*~

Hugs pp, I'm so glad you are safe. Hugs s

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

You are amazing, we are given intuition for a reason, you are smart enough to listen! Sounds like you need a concealed weapons permit. If anything just for confidance. or time for a big German Shepherd service dog!

Just make sure everything is locked in your home. I hang bells on everything, lol even the ties on my hooded sweat shirts....

NO one can get in here with out noisey bells all the way from India! Well eight dogs help too.

you know a class in Karate or some other defensive art might give you some peace too. We can make ourselves not feel so vulinerable.

I am not the tough cookie I used to be, so putting that spray 20 foot yellow jacket spray is a winner to keep around! have one ready at work!

Keep your head up, look aware, friendly but no nonsense person. Proud of you! love,debilyn

el-cee · ~*Service Worker*~

Glad you are okay PP.x

Cathyinaz · ~*Service Worker*~

I go happy you are safe but also glad you were so vigilant to your situation and did what was necessary to keep yourself safe.

HP was with you my friend

tiredtonite · Veteran Member

I'm so glad you're safe (((Paula)))) TT

milkwood · ~*Service Worker*~

Good call PP, likewise, glad you are safe.
Hornet sprays around here can reach up to four yards - I have not checked to see if it has similar ingredients to Grateful's suggestion of wasp spray, but let me know if you want some sent over ((((hugs)))))

maryjane · ~*Service Worker*~

Oh, so glad you are safe and listened to that inner voice. And I love the idea of the hornet spray.

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

Thank you all immensely for giving me a platform in which to verbalize and be heard. It is leading me to see there is so much more here than the experience and I will keep watching. It did bring up a memory that I had dismissed years ago as no big deal. When I was in college 2 young men attempted to rob me at gunpoint while I was working at a motel. I thwarted their attempt and eventually testified against them. What I did not do, was to experience my emotions around and during the event....vulnerability and fear were believed to be a weakness. Al anon has helped me to know that is a lie. Another piece of gold that unfolded in this event is, that, since I stayed present and in my body (acknowledging my fear/vulnerability and staying calm), I was able to see the guides that stepped forth to help me. God really does have my back, I am not alone. There were actually 3 women that helped me feel safe in the span of 1 hour and let me know they had my back. I saw the guides in the store and I see the guides on this forum...thank you.

grateful2be · ~*Service Worker*~

aww

Jen61 · ~*Service Worker*~

I think the wasp spray is a great idea. Can you have your cell phone on at work? If so that would help to dial 911 after you sprayed him. I would have been so freaked out. Take care.

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.