The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I again did not go to work. This depression has kicked my a** all do to the fact that all I worry and fear about my son that at this time does not want to talk to me. It's really hurts but what can I do. I love him and really need to work my program. God bless..
-- Edited by hotrod on Thursday 5th of December 2013 07:05:19 AM
I love him and really need to work my program. God bless..
yea, we can love them, but alanon is about US..not the drinker/user....alanon is about teaching us the 101 of self preservation......when i get depressed, I make me MOVE...DO something..clean out closets, tidy up a room, or deep clean something or exercise, get on the phone and chat w/someone who is supportive AND, MOST OF ALL, working the program steps, slogans and keeping the focus on me and nothing else...
its hard but doable.....if you don't take charge of your mind and emotions, someone toxic will be glad to do it for you....when i heard that, it really made me realize that i have to take charge of my life and what choices i make to take care of ME....
__________________
Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!!
One second, One minute, one hour , one day at a time this program can save your life.
Abandoning your self to depression, not showing up for your job, and your responsibilities is another way that alcoholism can destroy the alanon person who lives with the disease of alcoholism. We too must choose recovery. Just because your son has not chosen to recover it is imperative that you not abandon your life and run down the" rabbit hole" after him.
It only takes 12 Steps to walk out of this despair.
Please start using the serenity prayer, and the tools
-- Edited by hotrod on Thursday 5th of December 2013 07:14:17 AM
When I first discovered alanon I was faced with a lot of tired and weary people (they had just had a difficult time with a gate crasher so I caught them at a weak moment). However, this was a gift because I recognised myself in their tiredness. I did not want to be like them, I did not want to behave the way that I was behaving, so what to do? I figured that I needed to fill my time, as much as possible, with things that I enjoyed. At the end of each day I would ask myself 'what were the three best things today?' However bad things are, there are always the 'best bits' and thinking about those made me feel better.
So what can one do? I spent a disproportionate time painting my nails at one time, just to show myself that I cared. I learnt from the wonderful McMillan nurses who came to help me look after my mother when she was dying of cancer. They were all dressed up to the nines (I'm still working on that one!), they smiled and we laughed - just the sort of people tonic that we needed by our sides. My mother died to the sound of laughter - I imagine that she was giggling too - and I think that the nurses taught me that we can help the best when we look after ourselves.
So a big huge hug to you Gaby, and lots of recognition that this is tough. I hope that today is a bit better and wish you even more for tomorrow. One moment at a time. Sending love and support.
