The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well here I am again - I shouldn't have left really as I always found comfort in these boards. So much has happened since my last posts. Seems the last time I was on I had asked him to leave and he did. Not long after he left I found out I was pregnant. Yowza! He was out of the house for a while returning eventually. He went to meetings and counselling and did okay until the last few months. Driving home tonight I came to the realization (again) that this is NOT the life I want for me, my two older kids or my one year old. When I got home he was in bed (6 pm). Yup, he had been drinking all afternoon. Claims he just laid down for a bit - so, that's what they call passing out now? He always talks about these plans he has for his days of and he ends up doing nothing at all. What makes it really tough is that I am having some issues with my two boys and he has the nerve to judge them!!!
I just retread this and I see I'm all over the place. Sorry - my mind is racing right now!
i refuse to accept that behaviour from my kids so why should he be any different. Well, he's not. when I did wake him I told him it's treatment or out..he has made so many promises (don't they all) about going into treatment and almost every time ue says "I've really been thinking about it the last couple weeks and I can't go on like this". Odd really as he has managed to go on like that.
Sorry for the crazy ramblings of a woman in need.
-- Edited by Not Alone on Monday 2nd of December 2013 10:03:57 PM
Please, please search out alanon face to face meetings and attend Alcoholism is a progressive fatal disease over which we are powerless. Living with this disease I abandoned myself in an effort to control the situation and found that i too needed a program of recovery. Alanon is that program It is here that I learned to keep the focus on my needs , respond to situations and not react to insanity.
Aloha J and welcome back home...glad the birth was a successful one and concerned that the disease is still robbing the family of peace of mind and serenity. All alcoholics have intentions...and the disease with overturns all good intentions. It has been said that the road to hell is paved with good intentions and for me that is true; was true for as long as the disease owned my life. It is hard enough to fulfill good plans to get to good goals and it is impossible when alcohol owns you. The compulsion to drink was the strongest compulsion I ever faced in part because drinking was innocent and so accepted and a social pastime which I could participate in and get to my plans later. What happened of course was my life went away when I choose to drink first and abandon my plans, intentions and work. That's the disease. I pray he will have a deep moment of clarity while the disease sleeps and comes to find help in AA or where ever else HP hold the light. Take care of yourself and the keikis (children)...((((hugs))))
You say you have decided you can not live this way
Courage to change the things you can.
You say treatment for him or its done
I got to this stage and luckily i was in al anon i made the decision for myself and handed outcome over to hp. I have a boundary I will not live with active alcoholism i carnt anymore today I MATTER!!!!
my partner has been in AA 4 years sober this time for 15 months that is his journey all i know is I can not be around him when disease is active i have to protect myself and kids. If he chooses to drink there is nothing I can do, I hate it when he does it is horrible to watch the disease attack him but he know where help is. All I can do is protect my self lots of al anon.
Hope you are attending meetings, glad you have reached out we all have to figure out our own journey
