The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
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Good afternoon every one , we have another crisis here at home . And I'm one of those uncertainly what this is caused bye . Me and my husband sorted out our Boundarys we stay away from the topics that would bring us to the ring . I have my skills up to date he good on his end , but now the children are back at it again . There behavior has got worst there mouths never stop they focus to much on the other person . The finger is always pointed every where else but them self , my A husband stays out of it like out of the house most times . I'm stuck in the rut trying to be the referee here and keep myself in check , they were in counsling but that stopped when insurance stopped . I am going to make attempt to get to a meeting tonight I been home sick haven't gone out for a while . My son starts panicking crying screaming he is a young 12 year old boy . Who can not accept the fact his older brother left the house 3 years ago and stop talking to the kids. I'm sure I no the answer but then again I'm usually in some what of denial still. Is this all a part of my Ah becoming sober ? From all the anger that fills the air still or is this just a case of spoiled children who want to always be in the other ones buisness
Wisdom recovery takes time...time takes time so it's okay to slow down and keep it simple. A simple statement said calmly to the kid(s) like "It's okay not to do that" and then walk past leaves them with the thought that they don't have to blame, judge and accuse others for their fears. The walking on past after I said the statement was key for me so that I didn't engage and loose track of my serenity with a child. Often children can and will control me like the alcoholic only wish they could and then the truth is "My only problem is me and my only solution is God". ((((hugs))))
Yes I do , do that but then the children get worst . Do you think this is a sobriety recover behavior they expression since me and my spouse don't fight . Or just out of control both acting in co dependent and very controlling behavior . I no there fighting triggers me and need to get out of it . But I don't want them to try to settle it on there own because that won't happen .
Rosemary from the definition of alcoholism I learned that, "Alcoholism affects everthing it comes into contact with" and I became a believer especially when I became a therapist. They are affected and just because you and your husband have altered some doesn't mean that they are now not affected....they are and often they are without understanding whats going on. It is normal anyway for personalities to bump into each other and normal still for alcoholism to make that worse. They could also be unconsciously attempting to keep things normal like they use to be when you were normally fighting...you know the "old normal". Sometimes that happens and when things change they don't know what to do and feel the need for momentum. Try some Al-Anon slogans in your language with them. (((hugs)))
