The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today I'm not feeling up to par. I've been sick off and on for a couple of weeks now. I think it's all in my head
My son has made a couple of temps to contact me ( when in a sober state somewhat ) but I have not responded at all. I'm still weak and it would give him the opportunity to get to my weakness even though he doesn't really know that.
I'm sad and that is how I feel today. I hurt but I'm hanging on. I think it's going to be a crying day.
Thank you all for your support....MIP is the best
(((( hugs ))))
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Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth
Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.
I'm sad and that is how I feel today. I hurt but I'm hanging on. I think it's going to be a crying day.
********************** (((((((((((((((Cathy)))))))))))))))) i often heard that tears are liquid prayers....i never hold back when i need to cry...it is a release...those strong emotions need to be released in order for ME, anyway, to move to next step....u r grieving a loss...of course u r gonna cry.....to grieve is a very normal and necessary for the bodily release to do.............i am glad u r willing and going to feel your feelings
as to feeling lousey??? stress...grief....disappointment...dreams that never happened....a young life being cut short my alcohol....a loving mother unable to put the desire to save himself into her own son.......oh yea, grief is very normal and necessary in order to move to the next step of acceptance.......
my best male friend....my A brother in MIA again.....mailbox full on cell, he is MIA...all the signs are there....he hasnt' returned my calls...he knows he is doing something that saddens me and so he disappears/isolates....drinks until he is beaten down by the physical affects and then he has to recover from the hangover for a few days......then he will "show up" again.......i have learned i am powerless....i accept it...i don't fight it.....i will lose my best male pal one day....and that will be the END, essentially, to my bio fam.
yesterday i talked to narkie brother....he got is AA chip 7 years w.o. drinking....that is a LIE....AND he is doing illegal drugs....I told him i will celebrate when he is really clean, but don't try to bullS*** a bull****er and don't try to snow ball the snow man..........he isn't fooling me and i let him know...w/out rancor...w/out sarcasm...w/out meaness, but "don't try and fool me it won't work".........
grieving has been my often time visitor......it still hurts...it is still grief....it doesn't get easier as you lose one after another....each loss is felt and worked through in ones OWN TIME.
so, Cathy, take your time....BE WITH you and your feelings......I give you my loving support......
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Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!!
I can completely understand exactly how you are feeling. Since I've been released from the hospital my son and I have had no contact other then me evicting him but his step dad has been our middle man. I love my son but through out I'm hearing he is not looking good due to his using. It kills me but I can not allow his addiction to send me back where I was. I love him and always will be here when he is ready. It hurts that there are no words to describe our feelings. We are not alone and god will pull us through this. Lots of prayers your way. Let's take care of us and just know we are all in it together. God bless !!
Sometimes a "crying day" is really helpful and allows you to get all your pent up emotions out to where you will feel better. I'm sorry you are sad, we are all here for you.
Hi was wondering was italian cookie u r referring to since I come from Italy I was curious to know. I have been going on MIP to read and learn all I can about this dreadful disease since I have an AH that can not seem to stay more than a few weeks sober.
It's the name of a cookie that is made with butter, powdered sugar, pecans and vanilla. The cookies melt in your mouth, lorry. They are my favorite Christmas cookie.
Cathy you reminded me of when I missed my ex AH so much. I would think about calling him, then remember he was not him anyway. same as your son, you miss him,want to love him and feel his love for you. Yet you know to let this person in, would be fruitless as it is a walking disease right now.
I am sad you don't feel well. Hate to say it but part may be age. YOu may be pushing yourself and not know it. we think we can keep going the same way but we cannot. I know you are very youthful, so go easy to stay that way.
hope you take breaks and rest! I care for you a great deal, you are a very dear friend to me.
love,debilyn oh my son was out on an adventure...I heard his message before but thot it was an old one! so he had told me he was going off!!
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Putting HP first, always <(*@*)>
"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."
I hope you will find something nice to do for you. Wish I could be there to give you a hug. Virtual hugs suck. But I guess they're better than nothing :) ((((Cathy))))