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I have had sponsors in the past we'd meet up once a week or every other week, when we'd get together we'd work on step work or work on something. I'd call everyday to check in. I have a sponsor now and when we talk she is great! But we never meet up. I know it's my recovery and its up to me to work the steps, I don't need a babysitter. Just would like some in put on the whole sponsor thing.
Hi. First, let me say how delightful I find that hummingbird avatar to be. Is it a photo you found to use or is it a personal one?
Secondly, have you and your sponsor talked about meeting together? If not, I'd suggest that letting her know that you'd like to meet with her would be a 1st step in bringing that about for yourself? I can't imagine a sponsor being opposed to that? If she is opposed to that or it is impossible for her to do so, what might happen if you let her know that you are feeling kind of lost without face to face contact? Is that a possibility for you?
I rarely meet with my sponsor. We typically talk on the phone weekly and may meet twice a year and this has worked for us for about 7 years. To thine own self be true is one of my mantras. Determine what works for you, then a speak with your sponsor and see what works for her. If it is a healthy relationship, the two of you will not tickle the codependent behaviors and have a relationship based on truth. (((hugs)))
It's a beautiful thing that there are so many sponsors to fulfill different needs .. I've got a set number of sponsees and the way I work with them is we meet once a week for about 45 minutes of reading until they have worked to the 4th step and then it's about once every couple weeks.. I always tell them call whenEver you need .. there is Never a Right time to feel crazy .. One thing I have learned, however, is that while there are times sponsorship is the first loving and honest relationship many of us have had, I keep it sponsorship over friendship until they have worked further in the steps .. For me I find that when it turns to more of a friendship too soon, there are times it becomes a disservice .. There's not really a right an wrong but I find if sponsees hit at least two meetings a week and meet for reading, they are going to feel the effects a little more .. repetition of meetings, replaces obsession . the changes take place in the meeting.
When we started this relationship she told me that she is every busy in the summer months and would be will to be my temporary sponsor and see how HP will things out. I do call her almost everyday and when I'm in crazy train mode, HP has her pick up. I'm working on step work and let her know where/what's going on. It's funny how HP will have her pick up at right time.
I see my sponsor only on rare occasion at a meeting. We sit on the board together and do most of the prep work for the banquets and functions a few times per year - but other than that, we pretty much just talk on the phone. She's a TALKER - so I don't call too often to just say hi, because It's never less than an hour when I call. I have to be prepared for that with small kids.
Still - it's worth it, and it teaches me patience, accountability, humility and responsibility. All good gifts that I am grateful for. I keep in mind my HP knows best, and will guide me gently through the process as long as I am willing, remain teachable, and keep a good attitude of gratitude : )
Tasha,
Thank you so much! I'm finding that I really need to trust in my Higher Power more, HP knows best. The biggest thing I'm learning is I need to stop comparing myself with others. Trust in HP.
Feeling kind of lost.