The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
yesterday i had a minor panic attack due to loneliness that came over me. I have gotten better though, thanks to lessons learned due to meditation. i now know the feeling and the confidence in the fact that storms do pass. It is hard to sit and wait though. But i am learning to trust. So i went out for a walk in the forest, and just breathe... anxiety had lessened after that. Not gone, but less. not perfection, but progress.
I'll dig in more into the practice of meditation, sitting and breathing. with patience maybe my serenity does come back. pffffff this is all so new and unknown. but that has not to be feared, right?!
I use buddhist prayer beads -- I count my breathing, and for each breath I move a bead...it gives me a touchstone...helps me focus better ..in the process of meditating.
then I wear the beads during the day as a totem...to connect me to that morning meditative headspace. Just touching them, rolling them between my fingers, can help me center during the day
and you don't have to be buddhist to use the beads as a tool for meditation...
I used have have really bad panic attacks and back then was nor connected to Hp so understand that fear and lonliness.
You say you are learning to TRUST.
This was the answer for me. My Hp loves me he never gives me more than I can handle if scared I see him holding my hand and ask him to take care of me. Regarding Lonliness I attend meetings, use my phone, go to conventionst etc and PAY PRAY PRAY
Meditation has helped me so much over the past year. I'm not very good at it but even a few seconds of focusing on my breathing makes a difference and quiets my mind. I've also been reading and enjoying Jon Kabat Zinn's book 'Coming to Our Senses'. He does fantastic work with mindfulness for stress reduction. Your walks in the forrest sound lovely. I've just been outside and a lovely owl was calling so clearly from the woods below our house. I'm feeling very lucky indeed to have nature on my doorstep.
I found a really good meditation on youtube, if you're interested from Marianne Williamson. I am a Christian but I find great peace and release from doing her AM meditation(which I choose to do whenever I need to, LOL). I just add on to her visualizations and I focus on the 12 steps as well as my my own Christian faith. Anyway, PM me if you're interested. I don't want to put out anything that's not program material but I wanted you to know that there are other things out there that we sometimes need to supplement especially when we're trying to create a new habit or learn something new, like meditation. I was completely unfamiliar with 'taking time for myself' or just 'being' in quiet or solitude. I always had to be moving and those things did give me a release but they didn't help quiet my mind. I would be hiking the mountain but still be thinking about US or about HIM. Meditating has given me the freedom to NOT do those things and to experience a different level of spiritual release.
