The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I'm leaving a city in the Pacific Northwest and going back to my home city right now. I cried a bit when I checked out of the hotel (via the TV- I couldn't let the hotel people see me cry!).
I felt so safe in the hotel room all week. I was around 200 coworkers and felt very safe around them too... (Lonely at times, very sad and anxious too at times, but safe nonetheless).
When i get back east, it is necessary for me to ask my SO to leave my house. I'm afraid to. He won't harm me physically but I have no idea how he will react. I've never stood my ground with him before. This is surreal.
I won't even get a chance to see him until tomorrow evening after his work day. Oh, tomorrow's his birthday, too... And he thinks we're going out to celebrate. (Ill be able to get a F2F meeting and a session with my therapist before I see him, thought).
One hour at a time.
It takes courage to be honest. It takes courage to stand up for ourselves. It takes courage to trust that if a relationship isn't good for us, it probably isn't good for the other person either. Going to a meeting and a session with your therapist will certainly help you do what you believe you must do for you. Asking my HP to give me the words to speak, the tone to speak them at the best time to do that helps me face my fears and act with courage when I do that. When I do, I trust that the outcome is in HP's hands, too. I'm not responsible for how the other person hears the message or reacts/responds to it. I'm only responsible for my part and that is enough.
Thank you both :)
Asking for HP's guidance is a Brilliant Plan - I need to connect with my HP soon, then. I've had some trouble with that in the past, actually. But lately (I'm talking about within the past 2 weeks), I've been able to connect with HP. The connections are fleeting but I need to trust those moments more...
I feel like a little deer taking its' first wobbly steps!
Wow I can relate to this post. I just got home again from two weeks of onsite support where I actually felt like I belonged to something. People smiled at me and said thank you, no snarling no eye rolling no you ruin everything... I left today with tears streaming down my face. I am facing a similar situation but A does not live w me.
I will pray for you, I cannot believe sometimes how similar everyone's stories are here. You deserve peace of mind and have a right to live in your own home in peace.
((((GM)))) and ((((MM))))...stay right in the center of your HP's palms and let HP carry you...Growing up is scary and the scary is temporary. In support...keep coming back. ((((hugs))))
Thinking of you, Good MOnkey. I agree with Grateful - WOW does it take courage to leave and to set boundaries.
Grateful - I love what you said abotu realizing that a relationship that is not working for one party, is probably not working for the other party as well. This was a pretty big eye-opener for me.
this is my first time visiting this site. i'm feeling very low at the moment. i'm living with an alcoholic who is dry for 9 months. his mood swings have be
come unbearable. he keeps threatening to leave says can't stand to be around me and hates coming home .I have told him to leave. i don't have access alnon meeting because of work. how do i detach thanks
-- Edited by bulebelle on Sunday 15th of September 2013 08:39:55 AM
