The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My own experience in my home group had to do with somebody who was consistently late. I looked at my frustration through the lens of "Do I do that?" Is that why I'm getting so frustrated? The answer was "No." "Then, if not, why am I getting so upset?" Answer: "I saw myself as superior to her as in I'm always on time and she should be, too." I laughed when I saw the reason. Her tardiness no longer bothers me. For other things, unless I chair the meeting, I pretty much let people be where they are and let the chair handle disruptions. If I'm the chair, I deal with it as the situation presents itself by saying what I mean, meaning what I say and not saying it mean. That's my E/S/H. Not sure if it will help.
-- Edited by grateful2be on Friday 30th of August 2013 05:21:26 PM
Sometimes I feel like Murphy's Law! If something could go wrong it will! I am trying to stay sane through all the madness in my life. I am going to visit my mom once again in the hospital. I really don't feel like doing it but I know I should. So, tomorrow I am going to take advantage of the time spent up there shopping & catching a movie. I haven't seen one in a little while. I don't really feel much like posting today but I won't be able to until Tuesday as I can't figure out how to post on my tablet. I am sitting here at the library computer where I started posting oh so many years ago. I think I have posted over 800 posts! Isn't that something? I am really getting used to all of you & getting to know you better. It has been fun at times but very intense others.
Not to gossip or anything but we have a newcomer in our group that can be somewhat obnoxious & tries to control the meeting w/o meaning to. I am so frustrated w/ her. I need to practice my program & remember principles above personalities. She is new & I think sometimes she really doesn't know any better than to crosstalk or interrupt or ask direct questions. I am sitting here remembering how I used to be & I realize that when I was new, I did some of the same things. Does anyone on here relate? I hope I am getting through OK. I just need to let it out on here & move on & live & let live!
Sorry about my complaints! I am a work in progress & know better because when you know better you do better, right?
I learned how to use alanon tools in alanon meetings. Practicing the slogans, admitting I was powerless , and letting go of judgement, criticism and blame finally came easy at meeting. and then I was ready to bring them out to the world. I also leaned to say what I mean , mean what I say without saying it mean. You are doing fine The new comer will eventually learn as well
Any words in the opening of the meeting that talk about asking others to not crosstalk and reminders we do not interrupt or comment "directly" on another's share or give opinions or advice? hard when we get more recovery too and become healthier; we feel the presence of the disease much faster ..