Well yesterday pretty much didn't go according to plan on any level.  The kids and I made the most of it as we always do.  Life is what it is .. with the disappointments can come great joy .. looking for it is part of the gift I want to give my kids.  See the good out of the bad and let go of the bad. 

Today I thought about yesterday the good, bad and the ugly, I'm glad I took the break that I did and I will for a while .. I am not in the mood to deal with his s/mom of course the brother and the STBAX didn't show up until today.  WOW .. what a shock .. LOL .. as you can tell I'm soooo not surprised .. lol.  How sad that a grown woman is waiting around on two men .. one who has stolen from her never apologized or owned it .. the other hasn't bothered to come around for 3 years and now it's because he's gotten his g/f pregnant and at some point they are getting married.  If I pulled one quarter of what these guys have pulled I'm telling you I would be branded, tattooed and then skinned alive by her and her beliefs .. yes, that part just amazes me I'm sick to death of hearing what I can't do .. it's like whatever!  I'm just amazed as to what one can get away with in the name of a penis.  This is a penis issue and apparently I'm suffering from penis envy .. and the more I say the word the more I like it .. LOL.  Sorry my humor is way off today, .. this is how I cope. 

We watched 2 different fireworks displays from the house and I enjoyed them both immensely, we set off the pop it's I had never heard of those .. LOL .., lit sparklers and there are these weird things called glow worms and snakes .. LOL!!  I spent $7, it was the best money on junk I have spent to date. 

Last night I was pretty worn out.  A g/f of mine is calling me tonight and wants to talk to me about an offer we are going to put together.  My atty will present it to his atty and we'll see where we go from there, .. we are going to have to go to trial if we can't resolve this and honestly I can't afford it.  Well .. neither can he .. UGH .. what a waste of money.  We have NOTHING and this is everything to do with the fact he has to be financially responsible for his first family.  Sorry .. I'm not willing to let that go.  I guess if going to trial is what it takes .. then it is what it is .. there is nothing more I can do at this point.  

I have some things to take care of finances are not easy at the moment and it's going to be what it's going to be .. I've got some rods in the fire and things will turn around.  It's going to take time. 

Anyway, this weekend I'm going to treat myself and enjoy some well deserved rest.  I didn't make a meeting last night .. that's ok .. watching the kids, laughing, .. it was well worth it.  Tonight buckle down and get business taken care of .. I am not allowing anyone else's committee to stop me from asking for what I want and going from there.  I find with the s/mom she really projects a lot of her fears and I am learning to say no that's ok for you .. however that's not where I am at .. I'm sorry if that makes you feel uncomfortable. 

It was a great day.  The kids went to their dad's early today so they are having a good time.  I mean how low does someone's self esteem need to be to put the plans with "family" on hold for someone who stole from them and the other one hasn't bothered to come down for 3 years .. SERIOUSLY?!  I know I should have more compassion I just don't at the moment .. thank you for AA open meeting tomorrow I need it badly.  I'm just hoping she doesn't show at the open meeting I will not be happy. 

I got my first paycheck from this new job so that was nice and I will be ok financially, it will take a lot of time to get there again .. it's just ugh .. so not fun at the moment.  It's all going to workout the way it needs to and I'm really working on trusting that part of the process. 

The rent issue is the biggest one for me at the moment. 

At least everything else will be paid and that's what I'm focusing on. 

Hugs P :)