Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Post Info TOPIC: Customer service, lies, patience and practice


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:
Customer service, lies, patience and practice


Went to the Credit Union today after posting on anger.  There have been several issues there (and there is no other where the same thing doesn't happen in one way or another in our City) since I became a member that tend to set my teeth on edge as I breathe, feel, wait and practice.  My tongue wants out, out, out, but I'm in control of my teeth, so tongue must stay in until I give it the go ahead.

Anyway, each time I asked for help and was told by 2 tellers there was NOTHING they could do, the little emotion called anger in me began to stir, then tickle, then scream within me - "Let me at her.  I'm going to give her a good piece of my mind."  Well teeth stayed closed, tongue stayed in with each lie they told and with each bit of no helpfulness they offered.  With both of them, when I calmly asked the question, "Who might I speak with that can do something about this?" suddenly they both seemed to remember that "Why yes, there was something they could do about the problems" followed by a flurry of activity.

Although family members, friends, loved ones and clients don't hold the power over me I once gave them, banking institutions are a continued classroom for practice, patience and keeping the goals I've set for myself in sight.  Where do you go when the banks and the stores that you have to do business with right now all behave in the same way?  The two things I needed help with today due to CU error could have taken only a few minutes to resolve had the CSRs been people who see their job to be that of customer service.  It took 45 minutes in person and then a 15 minute phone call to resolve a problem with a debit card that wasn't reading at the credit union and then to reverse a hold on my account for 4 days because the teller deposited my check via the ATM card to make sure the new one was being read by the computer.  So much of the time and energy spent on this could have been avoided with a simple desire to truly help a customer who had a problem due to the CU's bank cards with willingness to act on what they knew they could do when I arrived and called.

Yep!  These are the kinds of situations that try my patience these days while anger begs to pay a visit versus the tongue with a withering "off with their heads" tone.  To me this is dishonesty, poor customer service and just plain laziness. Unlike other relationships I can simply drop or talk it out with or challenge or walk away from - can't do that with banks or grocery stores.  They are my classroom of learning right now.  There is a part of me that wants to gather a million people together to stage a demonstration in a major grocery store or credit union parking lot using the old classic line from a movie I saw many years ago:  "We're mad as hell and we won't take it anymore."  But that won't solve the problem.  It'll only create more drama and resistance to people caring for people.  There has got to be a better way to deal with what is really more than an irritation - especially when credit unions are responsible for looking after their members and groceries are responsible to customers' health and food needs.  There's got to be a better way to deal with all this than I've been able to achieve, but so far - just haven't discovered the solution for less frustration and time expended at Credit Unions and grocery stores.  Thanks for listening.        

 

    

 



-- Edited by grateful2be on Friday 5th of July 2013 04:25:18 PM

__________________

"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:

My question: Who trains these folks? A computer? I don't think many of them have ever truly experienced customer service in their young lives.
We're about the same ages. If I had behaved in any of my jobs as some of the "CSRs" I've met in these larger organizations, I would have been written up - union or no union - crabby or kind boss. Didn't matter. Feigning ignorance or refusing to help a customer could also have resulted in being fired at some businesses. I'm always surprised by the behavior in businesses wanting to stay in business. Well, there is still my backyard. I have a shovel and a big glass jar. I'll use it for savings.  The rest of it I'll carry in my shoes. (Giggle). When I retire next year, I'll become a vegan and grow my own food. If I'm not nice to myself, I'll just write myself up. 

Good to hear from the both of you, Betty and Cathy. I hope your days were peaceful and fun in some ways?



-- Edited by grateful2be on Friday 5th of July 2013 07:15:22 PM

__________________

"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 17196
Date:

Thank You gratefultobe 

Love this very human message 

Thanks for sharing the journey.



__________________
Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3026
Date:

What a day you had I know for sure how frustrating it can be when its so simple to fix without all the bull sometimes. I have a very low voice and sometimes when I use it in a matter not inviting they seem to just know I'm upset and something better get done one way or another....

Take care....

__________________

 Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth

Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.

 


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3281
Date:

oh yea, Grateful2be...I can relate to this

I am the customer from hell if I am being jerked around...I don't accept that they cannot do anything for me...Especially if I am the reason why they have a job....Uh Uh....not gonna happen

I wll stand there and demand supervisor to get taken care of If I know I have rightful complaint or rightful need for remedy

I try to be nice, but I am also very assertive.....and if they are rude or dismissing of me, i can show my fangs in a heartbeat....

I do protect my money and my rights as a customer.....

I went to a furnitur store who sold me a broken chest of drawers....one of the drawers was busted...brand new and busted

The owner who is known for screwing customers refused to help me....So I told him, this was wrong and I "strongly advise you to do what is right for me"

He refused..told me basically to go to hell

I got a picket sign and drove to the store and sat with my sign telling the people my experience when they inquired of my plight....TWO DAYS of this and I get a call from him wanting to "deal"

he took back the busted dresser, gave me a new one and gave me ANOTHER one that I wanted  1/2 price  AFTER I inspected it first

I said "OK" and the affair was over with.....

so now I have 4 beautiful real pine wood chests of drawers...3 in my room...1 in guest room.........I DO need to clean out some clothes...This is ridiculous needing 3 chests of drawers in my room.....



__________________

Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!! 



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:

I've done that, too, but I leave feeling awful and go back to make amends.  Then, I have to spend even MORE time there.  There's just got to be a better way to hold fast to what in my heart I know I have to do for me without playing the "Red Queen" even though I have to fight her knock, knock, knocking at my chamber door.  Too wearing for me.  I find myself questioning why it has to be so hard just to deposit a check or buy a cart full of groceries or talk to somebody who is listening.  My pointer finger has almost lost all of its identification properties as many times as I've had to push numbers to talk to somebody operating out of their garage.  Okay - its not that bad, but I love to make myself laugh.

So good to hear from you and thanks for my 1st laugh of the night, too.  (((sister friend)))



__________________

"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3281
Date:

grateful2be wrote:

 I'm always surprised by the behavior in businesses wanting to stay in business. Well, there is still my backyard. I have a shovel and a big glass jar. I'll use it for savings.  The rest of it I'll carry in my shoes. (Giggle). When I retire next year, I'll become a vegan and grow my own food. If I'm not nice to myself, I'll just write myself up. 


-- Edited by grateful2be on Friday 5th of July 2013 07:15:22 PM


 LOL.....my sense of humour is the one thing, I think that has kept me alive and at least partially, functionally sane.....I see U have a good sense of humour as well.....Hell if i can't fix it???? I can't pee on it like a dog does, but I sure can make fun of it, have my laugh and move on....LOL.....Peace, My friend  :) :) :)  OH 4got..we got emoticons, lol smilesmile



__________________

Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!! 



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:

biggrinbiggrinbiggrinbiggrinbiggrinbiggrin  You funny, funny lady!!!



__________________

"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1277
Date:

Ok, I get the thinking but.... here's a different way to approach the situation in the future - do whatever it takes to NOT be dependant on the outcome of "the rules". Banks, because of all the customer driven fraudulent stuff that goes on with them, have to - and I repeat HAVE TO (it isn't customer service making up rules to laugh at later), they have to follow certain protocols. The best way around these protocols is to not need your money RIGHT NOW. I keep a cushion of money in my checking account - I can freely deposit a thousand dollars and use it knowing that no matter what their rules regarding holding that particular thousand dollars are, there are still a thousand dollars I can access because I have that already there. That thousand dollars was not built in a day, it took months to develop that cushion; and, that thousand dollars isn't money I consider spendable, plain as that, its money I have, but it isn't money I need, so it can stay there as a cushion against any deposit that may have to be held because people have defrauded the bank before. My cushion didn't used to be a thousand, it was built, $50 dollars at a time, slowly to where it is now.

__________________
I am strong in the broken places. ~ Unknown All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another! ~ Anatole France


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:

Hi:  Likemyheart & Mattie.  It isn't about the money or the rules or the waiting for me. 

It's about the not listening, the lies (nothing we can do when they can and don't), and the haughty attitudes of the CSRs.  Identity theft, etc in many ways was brought about and/or increased by the banking industry with bank card and on-line credit card use.  Security questions are universal and not secure at all.  Employees behave as if it is a problem to pay attention to anything that is said by the credit union member or customer that isn't "in the script."  They are both in business because of the customer - not the other way around.  Thanks for your response though.  Helps me clarify the underlying issues for me.  

I am meeting with the CEO of the Credit Union soon.  The way that theft, fraud, etc can increase is due to the employees not paying attention to the customers and just doing their routine rather than staying awake to the present moment and doing the next right thing.  Not listening, lethargy and failing to truly assist a member/customer is what leads to trouble in my 64 years of life experience.

For me, going to the credit union or stores is like talking with a non-recovering addict/alcoholic/codependent who is sleep-walking through life.

Once again - fun to see your avatar. Likemyheart.  Sweet, sweet, sweet.  Mattie:  Love to see your weigh in on this.  I don't think I can whip out a deck of cards at the grocery or credit union, but I think you're suggesting making the most of the wait time?

Thanks to you, too, Jerry.  There was a time when Credit Unions in our area cared about that, but they're beginning to merge with others in other states or cities and doing the same ole way of business that everybody else does.  There was a time when credit unions were community-based and community owned and that isn't true anymore.  One never knows who really owns them.  They don't even publish the name of "our CEO" or "board members."  CSRs say they "Don't know the names?"  More lies in order to keep anonymity intact and accountability not on the radar. 

Perhaps for me now the solution is to accept it - stay awake and present in the moment - and treat people like they're human beings rather than computer chips that are to perform according to the software programming.  Continuing to be on the lookout for true community based credit unions and supporting local Mom/Pop operations, too.  And keeping the Red Queen in her parlor rather than jumping around in frustration and sword is something I need to do for me, too.

Thanks all.  Your input has helped me hear my internal guidance.  (((group hug)))



-- Edited by grateful2be on Saturday 6th of July 2013 07:05:59 AM



-- Edited by grateful2be on Saturday 6th of July 2013 07:48:37 AM



-- Edited by grateful2be on Saturday 6th of July 2013 07:51:54 AM



-- Edited by grateful2be on Saturday 6th of July 2013 07:58:54 AM

__________________

"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 13696
Date:

 

 

I love the power of "closing my account"...and then advertising it to the next new credit union...It worked wonders the last time I used it and the union we are with now is family.  Sometimes I remind them "I'm old and deaf and don't understand" and I love the response to that one also...course it's true and they play "keep coming back" just like the meetings and MIP.   LOL...it works when you work it.   smile



__________________


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3613
Date:

The world has a lot of inefficiency and random behavior in it.  Certainly we don't have to look far to find it.  If we wait until it's all solved before we have serenity, then I think we'll be waiting forever.  I appreciate how frustrating it is when things go crazy or take a long time.  It's a great position of strength to be able to detach and say, "Oh well!"  I think here too, expectations are premeditated resentments.  I used to go on trips with a group of people who had a running card game -- it would go for the whole trip.  Whenever there was a delay, they'd break out the cards.  Strangers would play along with us and become friends.  Once a 12-hour delay was announced.  All the other passengers were at their wit's end complaining and groaning.  My friends said "Yay!  Get out the cards!"  They really relished the game.  I think the trick was not waiting to get to the good part of the trip till all the delays and inefficiencies were over.  They liked the trip the whole way through.



__________________


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:

An addendum: I went to the credit today armed with my checklist of ways to behave there and drove straight to the ATM where I didn't need to do a thing but push buttons.

Then, it hit me. The one thing I've been missing. It's necessary for me to go in armed with the question: "How can I be of service here?"

I'm going to the grocery tomorrow and try this question out!



__________________

"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig

Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.