I had a good afternoon and evening with my daughter and grandson today.  Just a normal day with a trip to a movie, then home to TRY to grill hamburgers (they wouldn't cook up - guess the overpriced pre-lighted charcoals have taught me a lesson) and then TRY to broil them in the oven.  It must have taken an hour to cook them.  Not sure what kind of meat we really were cooking, but...just glad to spend the time with part of my family.  The magical part of being a family is over though.  My grandson is a teen, so fireworks are just not as much fun for him as they once were. My daughter and I would feel mighty silly running around the backyard with sparklers as my grandson looked on with disdain.

Anyway, I was so glad to have a peaceful, uneventful and normal time with them.  It helped me keep my mind off my son and what he might be doing or not doing.  Tonight, I've decided I won't call him at "our" time.  I'm fairly certain it will go as it did last night if he answers at all.  Your being there helps me enjoy what I can and be patient and trusting with what I can't enjoy.  It also helps me keep as solidly in our program as I can - not dwelling on what can or might or will happen or wishing some of the good times my son and I have shared could be repeated.     Thank you.

 

LOL.... I can just imagine you in the backyard running around with sparklers. Loving it!!

When we keep busy and don't dwell on the bad side of life we have some peace within. I happy you did that today. All we can do is pray that those good times with our son's will come back to us someday.

I know the feelings, the hurt and the heartbreak knowing you might lose him forever but to dwell on it hurts worse. And to step in only begins the cycle all over only to bring more hurt down the road. I have learned a temporary fix does not last....as I'm sure you understand.

We come here, we go to our meetings, we work with our sponsors, we practice, practice practice to stay strong and have the courage to continue to make the changes and in doing this gives our sons the respect that they need to succeed in their lives if THEY so choose.

I have to keep telling myself my son's words are not what I want. His actions in recovery is his only sign for me he is getting better. Until then.....Let Go Let God.

(((( hugs to you )))

Candles are going and prayers were said.......