The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I spent years stuck in an angry place focusing on therapy, meds, and trying to dissect myself and others, figuring out why they did what they did to me when really ill never know why and there's good reason for that...I don't need to know.
i found my Solution in literature in another fellowship and I think it's sad I can't talk about it in Alanon or ACA. Because all that helped me was getting into the Solution.
What I'm trying to say is I can analyze myself til the cows come home but where's the Solution in that? I can put psychological titles to things and validate my own resentments but where's the freedom in that? The spiritual language I learned is way different and unlike any other I ever found Anywhere in the world.
Recovery is for people who want it. And when I said I was going to come to fellowship I said I was gonna change. Have I changed, 3, 5, 10, 27 years into it? Have I REALLY? Have I had a spiritual awakening through the 12 steps? (If I'm not sure then well.....)
Have I sought and sought and sought God with all of my heart? Have I done all that I know is available to me for step work? Have I been entirely willing to even give myself the best there is In 12-step recovery?
Yes, today I believe I have. I have stopped diagnosing myself in doctors offices and I have allowed another who had walked a spiritual path before me put my hand in Gods hand. I have stopped relying on people who havent had spiritual awakenings To tell me what is wrong with me. I have stopped googling information on medicines that might help me. I have taken off the band-aids and exposed myself to God and my fellows, there are no more secrets. I realize I never killed anyone and I'm a Child of God, perfect as He wwants me to be with my beautiful brown eyes AND my big forehead.
God doesn't expect perfection of me but I must be willing to seek out the solution stated in tradition 5 Alanon...and today I believe I've successfully stopped caring about any other way of life than the simple outline of the main 12 steps...a design for living that works in rough going.
QUOTE...od doesn't expect perfection of me but I must be willing to seek out the solution stated in tradition 5 Alanon...and today I believe I've successfully stopped caring about any other way of life than the simple outline of the main 12 steps...a design for living that works in rough going.
WOW!! POWERFUL post.....and omg...I would be a basket case if I did not have the steps....I would have walked out had religion or traditional god thing but step 2 was came to believe in a HP as I UNDERSTAND it.....at first it was the program, my HP....now it is the "best WITHIN me" or that part of the Creator that lives within me....thats as good as I have come so far.....trusting in it is a BIIIG issue for me....But...ODAT.....GREAT post
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Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!!
