The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Oh my not getting to a meeting for 3 and finally I get to one. And boy walking in that door and seeing all of my family I call al Alon now. I felt at home. I had some positive days and I felt almost like the old me. That drink that drove me to his side of the street is now out of the house .. Please don't take this wrong or me being cruel . But I needed him to go away from me for me to get my head together. I'm living in a home with no boundarys against me now.. I'm able to stay up as late as I want. Wear what I want. Not have to explain myself or worried about being draged to the ring to fight.. And forgive me but I don't miss him.. My AH sober6 months.. When he still calls I can shut the phone off and not have to deal with any questions. It might not sound that wonderful to most but it's a great feeling for me to have that choice.. I am grateful today that I woke up not afraid of any questions . I'm grateful that I am here today with a clear mind and ready to help my self get better and stronger and hold my grounds. I woke up today to no longer accept bad behavior from any one.. I have peace and hope and love . That's all this semi co-dependent woman gonna say tonight . I love you al Alon.
Well after only 2 days of peace he back again and again. He just won't stay away.. I realized that the recent RO I thought he had on me was just to scare me. Who are we kidding , if he did that he would have to leave me alone. I would be granted freedom. So my days are up and down.. And I'm still trying to work on me with the time I have when he not here. . So that's where I stand today . Still trying to cope with the ah sober 7 months . I'm doing the best I can do with him around , and when the questions show up at the fight . I l now to my back on them and walk away. I can choose to answer if I want , does any one know if I can have a meeting at my house since I can't always get to one?
Well woke up this morning with the husband that's not surpose to be here at the house . Broke every boundary he made for himself . 30 day seperation. Had let him self in the house and told kids not to wake me. I was up and upset that he just shows up when ever he wants , then decides to catch up on trash surfing to see if he can find anything to pick on me with.. I acted fast not to react to this because I new he could not stay the heck away. I broke out all of my self help books al Alon and mental abuse books and started reading so I no to stay away from a fight.. The shed is back opened. That was his shed where he would drink . . But I guess this is a day of wondering more than hope if this crazy cycle of him coming and going will stop or am I going to make it . Legal!!! That was not my intentions , but the kids are now the reactors !!! Since he not here I see the kids changing there calmer there out look is good they feel at peace. And when he shows up out of the blue the children tend to get upset , my 10 year old girl who always wanted nothing to do with him. Asked him why are you here it's not wed ! You didn't call! I have talked about this with her that she still should respect him and not be rude , but they have adjusted well with him not here and now there confused!!! Any ideas to how to help them cope with him coming and going when he wants nothing to do with them
