The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I am a newbie. there dont seem to be any Al-anon meetings in my area at any times I can attend. I have been looking for ways to connect online and hope here I can make some friends. My AH was supposed to start outpatient group therapy tonight. He had orientation on saturday. But he didnt go. He called me at work to tell me ts worse and he has finally admitted he has no control and he needs in patient treatment. Because then he cant go to the store and buy anything. He will be forced to go to group meetings and meet with counselors all day. So the counselor is working to get him into a inpatient program but there are forms, release, etc etc. So after we hung up I was so nervous yet happy at the same time. I am still hopeful despite the worst 2 years of my life that I have had. The last 10 years have built to this point but the last year was the worst and its been getting worse as each new week passes. I am so happy he finally realizes he needs professional help. He doesnt realize I have already been to an attorney. I already feel like a single mom of 3 kids. So by the time I get home I realize he has been drinking today. Again I am so crushed. Why does it still bother me? This is the usual. I never know what I will come home to but I have learned to expect the worst because thats what it usually is. So even though he had these long talks and admits he needs inpatient treatment. He then went out and bought stuff. I hate this disease. It doesnt make sense to me. Just dont drive to the store! What is wrong with him! I cant get him to rehab soon enough. I dont even want to talk to him which thankfully I can avoid pretty well since I work FT and have 3 kids. Life is busy. I dont have time to deal with an AH.
Aloha Oregon and welcome to the MIP board and family...face page will tell you that here are two online meetings a day here which are not face to face meetings yet any and all Al-Anon participation, for me, will bring you closer and closer to the peace of mind and serenity you are wanting whether he is still drinking or not. I relate to your awareness about it being and you expecting it to be usual...normal...because that is acceptance one of the many rooms of Al-Anon where we can come to and learn not to judge it or him or her and just to accept that it is what it is for now. When I change it becomes different for me. I was born and raised within the disease of addiction...alcohol and drugs. Both sides of my natural family and then including me got very very sick off of chemical abuse and addiction...Some of the family died to recover and some are dying now and then a few of us have found the program and one of us, me has turned his life over to it. I am alive today because of Al-Anon and then AA...very much alive. I know that you can and will make it and recover if you truely want it and work for it and because I come from the addiction to alcohol myself I also know that your alcoholic, your husband can and will also make it if he does it with the same motivation. This isn't about perfection...it's about sanity, serenity and peace of soul.
I know there are recovering people in Oregon...two of them are in my family. They work this program on a daily basis. Keep coming back here often...read and share and practice, practice, practice. ((((hugs))))
You already received great ESH I just want to say welcome to MIP. Read all the al-anon material you can, make it to every meeting possible and things will start to change within you. This program works when you work it and you are worth it. We have many people from all walks in life with one similarity and all have grown and learned so much from al-anon and are happy to be here. I am sending you love and support on your journey!
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
Just wanted to reinforce what has already been said. My husband had two stints with rehab; the second time he continued with recovery because he knew his life depended on it and he wanted to live. I could not instill that in him and I sure tried! What worked best for me was to work my recovery, through al anon, because my life depended on it. You can find peace whether or not he chooses recovery. Keep coming back!
He will most likely drink until the second he enters rehab. Most do.
I did. I went kicking and screaming, terrified of life without alcohol.
im so glad he chose impatient treatment over therapy. There's no solution for alcoholism in therapy unless one is well along in the 12 steps and even then, I frankly don't find much use in it and there NO PILL for alcoholism.
recoverrd alcoholics who have a set of directions to pass on for the 12 steps are the only professionals or experts on alcoholism.
Hospitals and treatment centers are the front lines only, and a real good one will push him in that direction and into the arms of
Welcome to the MIP family... So Glad your here, and YES You came to the Right Place for Love, Support, Friendships & Meetings ;) You will see many say "ESH" which stands for Experience Strength & Hope! And that IS Al-Anon...
I agreed that ANY Al-anon books that you can get ahold of, Go for it! One of the All time Newcomer books thats a Big hit is "Getting them Sober" you can find it here on the Home page! And Because you have 3kids, I would also advise grabbing a Daily reader like "Courage to Change", "One Day at a Time", "Hope for Today" just to name a Few... They are Wonderful because you can read I Short page everyday, or Just one the days you need them... It has been my saving Grace more then once, and I have them ALL :)
If Meetings are not available "Local" to you, then Yes I would say check out the on line ones, they are where I Started, and I've been here since 08! After loosing my Afather to this Disease! Keep Searching your Area tho, sometimes they pop up and are a True Blessing in themselves...
Please Keep Coming back, We need you here as much as you need the Program... Its amazing the Power we truly have, when we accept that we are Powerless over the Alcoholic & His Disease, but Not Powerless over OUR Recovery from it, and I do Believe that Our's is Just as Important as theirs, if not more so...
So Glad you Found us! Continued prayers for you and your A... Nothing in life is Easy, but when you have a Support system like this available... It makes it so much easier as a whole!!
Thanks for being here... Take what you like & Leave the Rest... :)
Quote: It doesnt make sense to me. Just dont drive to the store! What is wrong with him!
I had the exact same feelings. Why don't he just STOP. After reading all I could about Alcoholism I understood what my son was going though and what he needed to do to help himself.
Now I know he is the only one that can do this.....not MOM.
I had let go and let God take over and I went into recovery for myself
Take care of you.....
((( hugs )))
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Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth
Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.
