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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> I'm moving on
Post Info TOPIC: I'm moving on
Cathyinaz


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I'm moving on
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I have realized everything I'm learning about detaching from my son is now a new learning experience with my partner ( non A ). After a pretty bad exchange this week with him I found myself saying the serenity prayer over and over again but about him now. Some very sad and hurtful things were said to me, about me and about my son. When he said I made HIS life pointless it all came into perspective. I was not put on this earth to make sure his life had a point to it or complete. I don't need to hear anymore to get the f out and go live with my POS son. 

Well anyways, I wanted so bad to come back at him again but with what I have learn in Al-anon I just stopped. stepped back and let go. I am starting my steps in my relationship with my partner. I need to quit taking his inventory and start taking mine. I need to take care of my business and my business only.

So from here on out I'm doing what I need to do for me. I have to take care of my assets, get my things in order and live here without engaging him in the short term until the house is sold. If discussion does come, say what I mean, mean what I say....but I won't say mean. Set my boundaries. I don't need to explain myself to him and I don't care what he thinks about me. I will detach with kindness...I will not attack......because it's not worth it but I'm worth it to recover and move on.

Let go let God..

(((( hugs ))))



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yanksfan51


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(((((Cathy))))):

Good for you--I know how difficult it is to get to that place, and I was reminded by a good friend who is in AA program that the program works for life, not just the issues surrounding drinking.  It sounds like you used this idea for yourself in your own life which is wonderful.

Wishing you strength and serenity, and admiring your courage.

Yanksfan

 



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Pushka


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Hugs Cathy,

Sending love and support during these challenging times .. this too shall pass.

Hugs P :)

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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
PP


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Wow Cathy, such strength and what a testimony to the power of al anon.  So perfectly stated; much ESH for all of us.  You are in my prayers, Wonder Woman!



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Paula
AngelicH57


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I'm proud of you Cathy {{Hugs}}

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Nothing is more fatiguing than the eternal hanging-on of an unfinished task.
Jerry F


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Those focuses sound like a personal "Just For Today" Pamphlet...Sorry with you about "the other itch" ... it happens alot.  HP's in support.  ((((hugs)))) smile



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bud


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It's awesome when clarity comes to usher us forward! Thank you for sharing a strong and inspiring post.

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beginnow


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You have such strength! I applaud you and send you peace in the process!

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Auntyaya


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Cathy..sometimes you just KNOW when the time has come...it is a sad realization that a relationship must end, but a  new journey lies before you and with every ending there is a new beginning..stay strong



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el-cee


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Great alanon Cathy, thanks for sharing and remindeing me the basics.x



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ilovedogs


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Thanks for sharing this, Cathy. Yet, I'm sorry that it's come to this for you. Even with non-A's we can struggle with relationships and being treated right and with respect.

Oh, by the way, I was at the conference this weekend, I wasn't sure if you were going or not but I looked for you!

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Struggling to find me......
Debilyn


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Good for you little lady! Sounds like you are making a major change by selling your home.


As far as the "partner", for me if he said one thing like that to me, I would show him the door. I won't allow anyone to treat me horribly like that, that was abuse what he said to you. How dare he talk to your best friend, YOU like that!

I am glad you are seeing who he is.

You are a good person dear, remember the we gotta teach others how to treat us!

hugz,debilyn



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Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

       http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html            Or call: 1-888-4alanon
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