The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I can't do anything about those things either but I do write it out. I want to see if I chose the right person and if not, why. And if I was dishonest with others or myself. And what I did in response to this all. And what my fear is. A lot of this is inside emotions and actions in private etc.
Basically I'm looking for patterns and to know myself better in general.
Basically I answer the 9 questions in AAs Big Book in the sex conduct part of the 4th step because tradition 5 in Alanon says we work the same steps as the alcoholic.
In that way I can grow towards who God wants me to be. (Shape a sane and sound sex ideal)
Best as you move ahead.
-- Edited by WorkingThroughIt on Wednesday 15th of May 2013 06:59:06 PM
So i had an issue today that i found out that my recent ex A was back to her usual ways and headed back with her ex before me. I was hurt, shocked, heartbroken! How dare she ! Didn't she know she was better than that! How dare she! Didn't she know how hard i had worked to help her get over that bitch! Didn't she know how this would hurt me!? How dare she! So i texted a friend. I needed to talk about how awful this ex was! how dare she! Do you know what my friend told me? as i sat here crying my eyes out in anger, hurt, and so many other emotions????
She said "get over it hun, its none of your business"
I was shocked! hurt! embarassed!
Then alas i was humbled.
The friend i reached out to is not even in the program! Yet she knew this was out of my control. She knew there was not a damn thing i could do to change a damn thing about it. She knew that i was upset and she loved me enough not to spare my feelings by allowing me to wallow in this situation that i have no control over. She loved me enough to tell it exactly like it is. She knew me enough to know that i was strong enough to take the truth even when it hurts like hell. I am proud to say that today, i am strong enough to take the truth and i have friends who will give it to me. The blessings i have are many. I am finally taking the time to work on me. Little by Little one day at a time i hope to feel better.
I had not thought to do that. I knew she was a bad choice from the day we met. I just wanted to play house, once again. I liek the idea of working out of the AA big book!
