The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
just wanted to express that I am just about to start step 8 and I am little upset and hurt with the reality of the way I have treated myself.
Thanks to Al anon and Coda I am realising I am a person as important as any other infact I should be the most important person in my life. I have been a care giver for 43 years to everyione excepts me. Today I work my recovery for me. To change my attitudes from my childhood. My parents did the best they could with what they had and I had it better than a lot of people. however they never taught me i was important, special, how to love and care for myself. I learnt a lot of sick attitudes and behaviours. So as part of my recover I need to make amends to me the little tracy who i neglected. I need to start to treat her the way al anon says i should, with all the love and kindness she deserves. I have boundaries today external and ibnternal. My life is improving by the day thanks to recover. Today I can give myself a pat on the back for all the hard work I have done to get me here I deserve it. to newcomers it really does work. keep coming back ,keep the focus on yourself you are the most important person we are all responsible for ourselves. I think my wildest dreams are about to come true hugs tracy xxxxx
Hmmm... yes, Tracey- food for thought. Some time ago, at a meeting, I heard someone say "it's a selfish programme". I could not go with that. For most of my life I had tried hard to fix my family. I did not really set out to fix my parents. But I think I had to fix a lot of things around them- broken, and unfinished. And constantly broken trust.
I felt that the selfish bit described the addiction and the behaviour it brought out.
At that meeting I resolved- not to be self centred, but 'centred on self'. To be honest my life was a wreck. My rite of passage into manhood I served amongst the wreckage of society. But slowly and steadily I have become a healthy human being. And I think I have established a good relationship between the human and the divine.
I am not sure if I have the answers here. What I think is most important is that I have a voice, and that voice is heard by some.