The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
(((Sincerely)))...what I learned in Al-Anon recovery was that God could do it all better than I could without having to check in with me about my expectations. When I let go completely two things happened simultaneously for me; 1. My alcoholic/addict and her higher power did a marvelous, better than expected job at getting her clean and sober while giving me a great example of humility and 2. I had way more time than I knew to take care of my own life. Go figure. Your heading (his business, I know, ...) is what you practice...let go of the "buts" and the "well sortas" and go buy a pair of blinders...you know those thingys that keep a person walking straight ahead. Hopefully your alcoholic won't "outgrow you" in recovery. Keep coming back ((((hugs))))
It's a God thing. He's either going to buck up and get a sponsor he can trust or learn the lesson about why he should have one the hard way. You can't make him do one or the other. Powerless. You are free to say what's on your mind as you are in a marriage, but I wouldn't have expectations that he will follow through just cuz you said to.
Oh I so remember those feelings of worry and the desire to control my husbands recovery/acquisition of a sponsor. I would feel so special when he would ask me for guidance, too. I finally had to say, I am your wife and that is something you need to discuss with a sponsor. When I finally stopped trying to do recovery for both of us (lol) he did get a sponsor and what a relief! Keep the focus on you and share your feelings with your sponsor and at your meetings hugs
hugs