The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I read your post here, and I hear you, I feel you. We are not that different when it comes to the feelings associated with loving an alcoholic or addict. We hurt, we guess, we question, we wonder, we fear, we give up trying, and then try harder, we attach and then detach, we hold on with all our might, and then we let go... We are Al-Anon's. Let us not forget that our love is what motivates us, to engage the most insane stuff we do, and the most sane things that can be done. While learning the Al-Anon way of life, we are not exclusive, of course it includes and involves others, but it has to be inclusive and that means we don't lose ourselves to the disease of someone else. We detach with love. We can only be responsible for the decisions we make, the thinking that we entertain between our own ears, and we don't have to personalize what the alcoholic is or isn't doing. Their disease is not about us. However, our own DIS-EASE is all about us. We don't have to walk in any one else's footprints, we can stand in our own as we seek our own healing. We can get better, we can recover, we can learn and grow.
You are not alone in your efforts. We all understand the hardships of loving an alcoholic, and we have all loved them to the extend that we squeezed ourselves out of the picture of life in many ways.
Today I am going to include myself in that picture. I am going to practice a higher level of self care, I am going to be good to myself in some small way, I am going to refrain from entertaining ill thoughts or feelings about myself, others or the world around me.
I am going to trust and have faith that there is a God, that has a plan in all of this, and I'm a part of that mighty plan. I have not been forgotten.
Please join me on this journey of self care today. When we are unified in love, of ourselves, those around us, the world at large and a Higher Power... Great things happen all over the world as a result. A dark stadium with 60,000 people and one lights a candle... it doesn't do much to give light to any one else. But when we all light our candle, one at a time... the stadium soon brightens up, and when all the candles are lite it is no longer dark... for anyone.
Lite your candle with me today and let us shine on the world the great love that comes from an Al-Anon's heart. If it wasn't so great.. it wouldn't hurt so bad.
John
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" And what did we gain? A new life, with purpose, meaning and constant progress, and all the contentment and fulfillment that comes from such growth."
