The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I just went to pick up my great Grandma.I am soo close to her.She is the best.When I got there to help my grandpa put her in the car...she did not know who I was.I had a tear rolling down.As we were driving in the car..she constantly repeated the word red and black,and said her numbers.She was never like this.I am afraid I will loose her soon.She kept telling me red,red,red.She also told me to take off my glasses because then the people will hurt me,or something to that extent.My heart literally skipped a beat.
I looked over to my grandpa while he was driving,and I saw that big tear drop falling down.I told him,"It's ok it is her medicine" Honestly I do not think it is the medication causing this.She also hallucinates now.She is talking to someone who is not here.It just breaks my heart into tiny pieces.
I wish that there was something that I could do to fix the problem.My grandpa will be soo devestated if she died.I would be too.I am more worried about him because that is his mom,and he already lost his dad.
So I wrote my heart out again....
Angel of Death
(a poem dedicated to the one I love)
I sit here crying, hoping that this will not mean she is dying
I see her look at me, with a blank stare
I am so hurt because I do care
She was my all
The one I ran to when I would fall
Now I look into her dark and dreary eyes, I know just me looking at her is a surprise
She asked me who I was, and told me hello
She shook my hand instead of embracing me
I wanted so bad to tell her who I really was
Instead I pretended for her just because
I didn’t want her to forget me
I am her only Great-Grand Daughter you see
Yet I am a stranger in her eyes
She cried for no reason
Maybe this is caused by the winter season
Whatever the cause is
Please bring her back soon
I want her as she was before
But I also don’t want her to hurt anymore
As painful as it sounds
I hear the wind whispering
My hair blowing
I don’t this to be the last Holiday
I love her, and I want her to stay
Please angel hear me now
I don’t know how
But please let this not be the angel of death
Keep her breathing and not let this be her last breath
Lauren~
-- Edited by Lauren ashley at 17:48, 2006-01-01
__________________
~life is like a box of chocolates you never know whatcha gonna get~
Actually I've seen medication push an elder with an ordinarily clear mind over into dementia. The family had to stay with him in the hospital overnight to ensure the night nurses wouldn't give him the sleeping medication that caused him to go downhill and do so poorly. It took a long time for it to wear off after he got out of the hospital too.
Having said that, however, I am so sorry that you are experiencing this, Lauren. I know it is very distressing to see a loved one this way.
I had this same thing happen to me with my mum, different situation, but all the same heart wrenching. I will say this though, be thankful every day that she is your "Great grandmother", and that you had all these years with her eventhough you are still young.
My mum was only 48.
You are a beautiful person with a god given gift, use it to your best advantage....coz your worth it.
All the flumpy love in the world
flumpyxxx
__________________
Life is like a box of chocolates....Sometimes it get's sticky!!
If your Grandma is taking medication like morphine it does tend to give them hallucinations. It may also be dementia sweetie from old age. Try to spend every moment you can with her and remember all the good times as every day is a gift. I hope she is not suffering in anyway. My nanna is the only grandparent I have alive and she is 92. She lives 1300kms away and I want to make sure i visit her this time as I think she has decided she is ready. Pray to your HP to give you and your grandfather the strength to get through this. Luv Leo xx
Can you have the family consult a doctor. My mother went into dementia when she went into the hospital. There are many medications now that can help out it is not as hopeless as it once was. I think it can make one feel very helpless to be around someone with dementia but you can consult a medical professional, not blame yourself and also know that sometimes people with dementia go on a long long time (remember Ronald Reagan) it is not necessarily a sign that death is imminent, ill health yes, death not necessarily.
