Now It's Real - Al-Anon Family Group

tiredtonite · Veteran Member

Now It's Real

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

Yes my friend it is hitting you hard, that will happen. You are right, cuddle up and do what you have to. Been 13 years for me and dang it TT I still want to go see her every sunday, or at least talk to her on the phone.

I am glad you have good memories. Don't be surprised if other losses hit ya now too. It tends to be that way.

I kept my mothers last purse for many years, then it bugged me so took out the special stuff and that was that.

Your attitude is very good, gotta take care of you. We were so blessed lady to have such wonderful moms.

"God could not be everywhere, so he made Mothers." love you TT, debilyn

wp · ~*Service Worker*~

TT, I know what you're saying. I think it never really goes away, but maybe as time passes you'll be able to smile more often at your memories of Mom.
I know it hurts. (((TT)))

wp

DebLisa55 · Member

Tiredtonite - I know how you feel. It will be 2 years this Friday, February 28 that my mother passed away. She had a stroke on her 80th birthday and literally she died in my arms at the hospital. There isnt a day that goes by that I dont think about her -- something reminds me of her or I can still smell her perfume even when I am home alone. A perfect example is last night. I was watching the oscars, and they sang a Frank Sinatra song "high hopes". Omg my mother and I used to sing that song when I was little. I have not thought about it in years, and instead of crying when I heard it, I was smiling. I even tried making it my new ringtone but verizon doesnt have it.

Its too soon right now but the deep grief you carry around with you will become managable. Over time, the tears will not always be from sadness. I hope for you its sooner than 2 years though, and also I hope I did not upset you by writing this. I just wanted to tell you my story.

Pushka · ~*Service Worker*~

Hugs TT,

Sending you love and support, soooo glad you are here to share your story.

Hugs P :)

el-cee · ~*Service Worker*~

Mums are such a huge loss. I lost mine when I was 33. So hard. I still have this craving for her at times. Sometimes I can feel her or even smell her perfume. It gets easier.x

RobinKSC · Veteran Member

I hope you are feeling better soon. I am sure your mom is watching over you...take care

tiredtonite · Veteran Member

Thanks (((everyone)))) for sharing you memories of your loving mothers with me. I'm realizing that just like we use the peeling of an onion for the recovery process, the same might be said for the grief process - two steps forward three steps back. Seeing to the house is the next big thing. My brother hopes a new family will live in it. There's a lot still ahead of us. I'm cautious when I say this but my brother almost seems to be a changed person for the better. to his sister. I'll keep my expctations small but it would be nice if he's had a spiritual awakening of sorts.

Debilyn, I called my mom on Sundays too and I have a lot of her personal things too. It's helping me feel close to her. Yes, we are very lucky to have had wonderful mothers. Thank you.

wp, Thanks for the encouragement. I look forward to more smiles and less tears. I think I'm just more vulnerable right now because it's still very new. Getting sick makes me feel even more compromised and weepy. But with that said, I can be singing a happy song on the radio then find a recipe of hers tucked in a book and burst into tears so I guess I'm just going to have to go through it. Thank you, it helped to hear it gets better.

DebLisa, I hope the anniversary of your mom's passing is a day of celebrating the positive energy she had. You're lucky to have those fond memories. No... you didn't make me feel sadder. I smiled and felt less alone. Thank you for sharing.

Pushka, Thanks for the hugs!

el-cee, I know I'm going to carry that feeling with me always. I think the bond is so great, it's almost magical. Thanks for sharing.

Aww robyn, thank you. Yes, this is my 5th day with the flu and there's no one on earth who took better care of me when I was sick by my mom. Thanks so much.

TT

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