The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well, I have lots of options and I'm not sure what to do at this point. None of the choices are going to have pretty outcomes and honestly I'm to frustrated to care. I am powerless over other people's involvement when it comes to my STBAX's crazy behavior. They don't get it and I'm waiting for a 911 situation to happen I can feel it.
I just got a bill from the atty's office and NOTHING has happened, yet I owe them 1200$. Two court dates and we are already over 3200$. I'm horrified. I am also taking the conflict of interest case to the powers that be and see if I can get something back money wise THAT is 4200$.
I found out that I was let go from the job illegally, they knew what they were getting when they got me I was completely up front about the court stuff. Granted I'm sure they could come up with something if they wanted to I have to many fires to fight at this point to worry about this .. honestly a job is the least of my worries right now. I may be moving out of state and refiling at the rate things are going.
I did go to the domestic violence shelter and I will start counseling individual and group. I have to talk to my atty before I can do anything .. I have let her know what is going on and now I have to go in and drop off ALL of the new paperwork that I have.
I do not have to let the kids go to their dads at this point and so visitation is going to stop. There are a NUMBER of reasons the biggest one is his behavior is getting more and more out of control.
Soooo .. LOL .. I'm sitting here going now what? It's a good thing I'm not working at the moment now .. I worked enough to gain some confidence self esteem and so on. The kids have called me from school 3 different times alone this week. They both need extra attention at the moment. Yesterday a leg of power went out thankfully the power company came and fixed it the problem is this .. this same leg went out before and it's because the box is illegally wired .. is anyone catching onto a theme in my life at the moment?
I will go and find out if I can qualify for any benefits I'm not sure where to start even. Thank goodness I do have some already. I get to keep those for a time and hoping those will be renewed that helps me a great deal. I'm going to the school to find out if I can find a way to go school full time next fall and if I can get some kind of grant, government support. I hate that however I think it's the way for me to go to get an education and be home with the kids at this point.
Anyway, that's where things stand. I really dislike atty's at the moment and this is a nightmare and the good news is .. it's not as bad as other cases are. The kids are insistant they do not want to go and see their dad at this point. So I am allowing them to dictate when and if they choose to see him. The sheriff and police department have flagged the STBAX so really it would be in his best interests to leave me and the kids alone at this point.
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
UGH, Pushka, I'm sorry that things have gotten that bad with STBAX for the kids! That really sucks on all fronts in many ways. I've heard that attorneys can be extremely pricey, it's one of the reasons I've held off on any legal action with my AH because the cost could kill me financially. Honestly, I am afraid for you and the kids if he's getting that out of control, I'm so glad that you are taking the necessary actions to protect yourself and that your kids are smart enough to know when they're in danger or uncomfortable. You are in my prayers!
((((Pushkak))))...for me overwhelmed always means letting go and letting God and talking with sponsors and others as you are doing here. The first three steps distill down to
"Trust God" and I don't add to the overwhelmed feeling by doing that and taking on more stress because I've got God in my corner. Overwhelmed also means slow down and "Think" which is an old Al-Anon slogan. I look at "my part in it" because that is the part I can adjust and change. The program works when you work it. In suport. (((((hugs)))))
The most frustrating/overwhelming part is what does he have to do for people to get how crazy he is? Does he hurt me? The children? His mother? He's very angry that he got blown out of the water over the weekend. Honestly as long as I get money I do not CARE what he does with the rest of it. That was probably my part .. at what point is it enough for the kids and I? I mean at what point does the system work for the kids and I? This has been going on since January of last year and I filed in May.
The lawyer FINALLY called and asked me to come in and set up and appointment .. Good grief that took long enough. The other atty FINALLY signed the paperwork. It's been filed however I have NO idea how long this is going to take, what it means, and so on.
I'm sure it scared her that I don't have a job. We'll see.
Hugs P :)
__________________
Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
