The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My husband has tried every possible manipution to stay at our house. From suicide threats, to divorce, to you don't care about me, to why are you making me do this, to flushing the joint that was hidden in our cellar,to I'll call a real estate agent and sell the house, the latest.... Mr. Nice Guy. I have not backed down and maybe he is beginning to see that I won't. I don't know. The last 24 hours are proof positive that I cannot live this way. His attempts at manipulating me are only showing me that he truly need to get help and that he cannot stay at our home to do that.
I am exhausted and I know that in a couple of hours when night falls the chaos will begin again. I wonder what things he'll think of to say now... will he run out of things to say or will I have to hear a repeat of last night and this morning. God I hope not.
But it is another day and I made it! He said to me today, "I don't want to lose you" my reply was "and I just want YOU back, I lost you a long time ago." I am not an uncaring individual, I am just taking care of ME and my sons. If I tellmyself that enough I am sure I will keep myself convinced.
Sticking to your boundaries can be hard (depends on the boundary) and living with an active A is so hard.
I hope coming here to vent helps you as much as it does me. You are right, you are not uncaring, and that shows in your post. They may think asking them to leave is about not caring, but it isn't, it is about putting our needs first.
Keep up the good work.
Much Love,
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"Today's problems can not be solved if we still think the way we did when we created them" -Albert Einstein
