Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

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Post Info TOPIC: New


Newbie

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Posts: 4
Date:
New


Hi I'm new yer but not to alcohol problems. My AH who has depression anxiety and PTSD is destroying our family. My 19yr old and 20yr old have moved out and now my 13yr old has asked if we can live with my dad as he can't stand the drinking and yelling anymore. I also have a 4yr old. My AH has become so emotionally and verbally abusive to me even in front of the kids. I am away for 4 days working but my son came with me and I left AH with my daughter but no money for alcohol. U guessed it somehow he is drunk and carrying on like an idiot on the phone. It's always someone else's fault,he's stressed been picked on by all of us etc etc. my son just said please let's not live there anymore. AH only drinks at night 2 to 3 nights week only cause I control our money. Time to put kids first. Sick of broken promises. He did detox 3 times last year but never lasted 2 days home. Will lose our house but not my sanity I guess. This is so difficult. I have been such an enabler. I try to make things better for all but I can't go on. I lost my mum this year, our best friend trying to look after my dad my brother who has a major disability my kids , working part time and my AH. Time to put myself and my kids first. Easy to say but to do? Sorry about rant just fed up, scared and hurt

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Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 121
Date:

Downonthefarm, I'm glad you are here.  I'm pretty new here myself.  There are some wonderful people with experience on this forum.  It's also good to find a meeting nearby where you can meet other members face to face.  It's really important in helping you recover.  Something I learned here is that we need recovery too, not just the alcoholics in our lives.  Yes, we have enabled and we have been welcome mats to their abuse.  It's time to take care of you and your children.  Many prayers coming your way.  Please keep coming back.  It really helps, even if you just vent. 



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Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 4
Date:

Thanks Annie. Just tried to ring home and phone engaged. Don't know if he left it off or on phone. It 2am worried if my little girl ok. Can't sleep now and have to get up in 3 hours. The things we do. Hi from Australia

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~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3026
Date:

I too am a enabler but now starting to learn with the help of Al-anon and my HP to help me and Let GO. I know how you feel and it will take time to make the right decisions for you and your children but with support and love you can be happy again.

Take care of you....

Hi from Arizona, USA

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 Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth

Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.

 


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 164
Date:

Hi! get to a f/f meeting, if possible.  It was a God "thing" for me to find al-anon and I'll be forever grateful.  I wonder if your child is safe being left with him, you may want to rethink that issue.

Gettingitright!!



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Just go a step at a time, one day at a time.  And you'll find a rich, thankful life you never thought you could afford.--A Rogers

Gettingitright!

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