The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I made it to and through my first meeting and went to another yesterday.Thank you ALL for your encouragement to go! I felt like I should have signed in though with a big fat Crayon instead of a pen! :)
But seriously, I could relate to so many, cried the whole time, and have felt numb since......but it is a good numb.
Yesterday's meeting was much smaller than the first. I felt so much more comfortable. One lady put a halt to my overly gung-ho-ness about the literature when we laughed and she said the ODAT and How Al-Anon Works books are ENOUGH for now.I'm lovin the tell-it-like-it-is......in every aspect.
Anyway, I just wanted to share I think my HP is working on me and bringing some things together little by little.Yesterday, when she said enough, it reminded me of a friend who used to sign off emails, letters and phone calls withI wish you enough.
That being said, I dont have much to offer on here yet, but at least for now I can pass along to you a heartfelt.I wish YOU enough!
Good Job Thank you for coming back and sharing your positive energy and experience. You did a great deal in reassuring anyone here who is anxious about their first meeting. That is how it works
i am thinking about going to my first local meeting this evening however I keep finding excuses for not going. I am sure that it would be good for me and that it would help me in he healing process however I am affraid of how I will handle all the feelings and that I dont fit in.
GREAT JOB For Making that Step to Walk thru those Doors... :) And Twice... WOW... You Are Doing Great :)
I Remember my 1st Meeting Well...And I Cried ALL the Way thru it, and at the end the peeps looked at me and said: You don't have to share, but if you would like too I bet it makes you Feel better :) And I Remember I Spuded Soooo Much Anger at My Afather... (I Lost him 2months before my 1st Meeting to Alcohol) For Leaving me... I was So Mad I Could have Spit Fire... But WOW... The Release Alone... Brought me More then I Ever Dreamed of... I don't know if I was "Open" to learn in my 1st Meeting. So you are ahead of the Game ;) I don't believe I even heard a Word till about my 4th-5th meeting.. I just wanted THEM to FIX ME! But I am Very Grateful that I have stuck to it, Because NOW.. "I" Am Fixing Me :) Along side my HP...
This Program has proved to me that it works... When I Work it ... And I'm Worth... And So Are you :)
Welcome to Miracles in Progress So glad that you found us
You are correct your experiences are very much like many who attend alanon meetings. Alcoholism is a disease and manifests much the same way in each alcoholic. We who live with the disease also manifest destructive behavior such as:
Irrational fear, anger, projecting outcomes, living in the past or the future, focused on everyone else, are a few of the destructive tools we use to live by. We need a program of recovery in order to make sane constructive choices
I urge you to go back to alanon and attend
You are worth it
-- Edited by hotrod on Tuesday 8th of January 2013 09:24:27 PM
Hi all, I just found this site this morning. I thought about going to a local al anon meeting tonight after work, but chickened out. I so want someone to talk to about the alcoholic in my life and the roll I've had in his life, but I'm tired of being turned away from so-called friends. He just got out of doing thirty days rehab (he got out this past Wed. 1-2-13) and before that he spent 14 days in a psyche ward in a hospital. He was wasted, flagged down a police car and told them he needed help or he's going to harm himself or someone else. The first thing he did when he got out? Right to the liquor store. He's been an alcoholic since he was a kid, he's now 53 and I have NO idea how he is still alive. When he flagged down the police he blew a .303! I last saw him on Sunday when I went to his place to see him...he couldn't stand or walk on his own. He scooted along the floor to answer the door. If this wasn't bad enough he's been smoking crack too which he knows is lethal when drinking. I had no idea about the crack. He's had problems like this all his life and I have known him going on 7 years. He's been clean/sober before and was when I first met him. I didn't know he had substance abuse problems until I was already emotionally invested. I know, I know I need to walk away. I have been telling him no to things the past 4 months when I didn't before, but he has no family and no friends. I've stuck around because he makes me laugh like crazy, great conversationalist, is a bold person and came into my life when I had divorced after a 20 yr marriage. He's seriously out of hand like I've never seen him and this is the first time I have ever been exposed to anyone with any substance abuse. I am in therapy, but not strictly for this relationship. I started therapy after my divorce and move to the metropolitan area I moved to. I know and truly believe his problems are not mine, I did not cause them and I do not have any guilt in telling him no, but I love him (UGH!) and hate seeing him this way. He was crying Sunday saying he hated being like this and I told him he knows what to do, stop it. Anyway, I am conflicted because I don't know how much more I can take and yes I know I shouldn't take any of it, but I can't just walk away. I know you all have heard this all before and maybe shaking your heads at me, but it's new to me. I feel like I am in an emotional prison. Thanks for the ear.
Thank you Hotrod! I worry, I am angry and most definitely put others before myself and always have. I KNOW I am ok without him and do well, but i think about him all the time. He does the usual, no phone calls and I go days without seeing him, but I have never ever contacted him when he's off doing who knows what, he always contacts me. What I have done though is call hopsitals to see if he is in one, he was averaging four visits a week before rehab. I've even called the morgue. I have gotten stronger the past few months and I do know I need/want the support from others so that I can get back to me. Lately all I want to do is cry. I'll look at meetings in my area again. Going the first time is the toughest it seems. I don't think I've had so many emotions going on at once and the one that angers me is the love I have for him. Here's to a new day.
Sorry for the delayed reply. I've been swamped at work and AH has been hittin the whiskey (beer is his usual choice). Exhausting! Your kudos, love and support...and laughs...are uplifting!
(((Masi))) Believe me, you WILL fit in and they WILL make you feel welcome! Someone is going to say SOMETHING that you can relate to, and whatever feelings that brings up in you, you're in the right place to feel it. I kept saying to myself I'm here. I'm here. Then, I went. I went. It's emotional but it's good.
(((Fool4You))) Friends just can't help with the situations we find ourselves in. But these people in Al-Anon can! They've been there, done that. And they know what they're talking about! It's up to us to follow.
I hope you two go. You'll be surprised how proud of yourself you'll feel for going...and doing something FOR YOURSELF!
On the funny side -- even though I'm trying and think I've got it, I still don't have the Serenity Prayer memorized....and they say it so fast! So, with my lag time, I'm muttering along, "God grant me the serenity to change...oh...uh...change...uh...change...can and.........to know the difference." Then I was the ONLY one in that WHOLE room who said "Amen!" :0
Oh, well, maybe some day I'll get it right. AMEN???
For me Alanon is summed up in two words... laughter, and tears.