The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well my best friend--former crack addict and alcholic--recently relapsed over Christmas. I have saved her life multiple times this year...and been hit by her abusive boyfriend as well. She wanted to stay at my aprtment when she was kicked out of her sober house, but I refused shortly after I found out she began shooting meth. The feelings of guilt I am having not being there to help her are bringing me back into the depression I have struggled with all year long.
I know even if I was there for her she wouldn't listen to me...but I still feel the need to help her, though I know it is only enabling. She knows how to manipulate my feelings...and my codependancy...forcing me to stay attatched to the situation despite my sponsor telling me no. How do I move past this...How do I still love her but not condone these actions? Not a good way to start 2013...
Welcome to Miracles in Progress i am so sorry that you are experiencing this painful process. I urge you to look for alanon Face to Face Meetings in your community and attend. The main alanon number can be found in your white pages.
Living with this disease, over which we are powerless , we need a program of recovery. It is important to break the isolation, develp new tools to live by and take care of ourselves. You ae not alone nor are you responsible for her illness
I can relate to your feelings, FALSE guiolt was a biggy for me in the past.
I had to learn to sit with it and do nothing. I used to ring my sponsor and speak to al anon friends or come on here. Reading al anon literature also helped especially on enabling and responsibility.
Today my partner is in and out of sobriety. when he picks up I leave him to it , his choice . take care hugs tracy x
