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Don't you love how he sits there like parent of the year judging you when you wouldn't be out there trying to do it alone if he had been a mature adult, partner and father. Argh!! They really are infuriating.
-- Edited by WornOutMrsFixIt on Friday 21st of December 2012 11:55:44 PM
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"Just being there for someone can sometimes bring hope when all seems hopeless." - Dave G Llewellyn
So Wednsday night my 14 year old daughter went to a nearby church at 7 pm for youth group and I called her at 9:30 to see if her and her friend were going to be coming home soon. She said something really bad happened and I needed to pick them up. So I did and she didn't want to talk about it until i dropped off her friend, after I did she told me that this boy who has been stalking her already and causing her drama galore, ding dong ditching when she was home alone one night over nad over and calling and leaving her scary messages, he now got into a fist fight with a guy that my daughter hangs out with because he was jealous. After the fight he went into the church kitchen and grabbed a couple steak knives and went down by my daughter where she was alone in the foyer and started stabbing the wall near her while grunting and looking crazed. She was crying while telling me and all I can think is this is the stupid crap her dad used to do around me and I moved us down here to get away from it and here it it. I am sooooo unnerved, that she is now afraid for her life. I and the other boys parents that fought with this kid that has been stalking my daughter met with the principle and I told them I had made a police report and wanted to know what the school could do to protect her while she was there, I already take her and drop her off now everyday since it is no longer safe for her to walk the 2 blocks. They sent us to get a restraining order which we got and have a hearing now in 2 weeks. We had to call my exAH and tell him about all this and of course I should have told him sooner and blah blah blah, but basically he was glad I had handled it the way I did. I spent the whole day getting the restraining order and meeting with people about this case, I got home in time to get ready for work and ran out the door. I get to work and shortly after get a call from the exAH and he is telling me he can't believe I am at work and not with my kids at home. Like I don't feel bad enough that I can't protect my daughters 24/7, but I already traded to get the day shift off to get done what I did and I had to work the closing short hour shift in exchange. He called to guilt me and make me feel like I was letting him down again with our kids. So ridiculous when he is sitting there drunk judging me because I chose to divorce him and start over. I am feeling pissed because had he not been a scary drunk I wouldn't be in this situation anyway and he wants to bring his misery my way again. I already had a terrible few days without his help thank you very much! I could cry and scream in anger right now. He is coming to pick them up tomorrow and have them through Christmas and I think I need the break and need to have a good cry and a soak in the tub I tell ya.
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
Ohhhh BF .. I'm sooooo sorry that you and your family are going through this ... UGH .. I will be praying for you guys big time.
Hugs sending lots of love and support, P
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
((Breaking Free)) What your daughter is going through is tough, my prayers to you both. I think its great that she can come to you with this and you are showing her how to deal with emotional bullies in the right way. Being a mum is the hardest job and your doing great, easy for him to sit in his ivory tower. I hope you have a peaceful christmas and focus on you and your needs.
Much love
Simone x
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What a caterpiller calls the end of the world....God calls a butterfly
My ex a has done this to me for a long time. When something goes wrong he gets angry that he was not told. He abandons us for alcoholic, his reactions are not that of a normal human and the window of opportunity to talk has been getting smaller and frankly non existent lately because when he's drunk he's on another planet and when he's sober he's sick physically and mentally. He's gone but he enjoys feeling sorry for himself when he's left out the loop and I honestly think it helps him feel like had he known he would fix it. Delusional. Although, the program suggests we should give them their share of responsibility, scary thought though. Maybe he would reach his bottom quicker. God, I need to mind my own business. His bottom is no concern of mine. Sorry
For rambling on. Baffling right enough.
That is terrible! Prayers for you and your daughter.
As far as your ex - Well that is typically alcoholic divorced dad behavior which is trying to exert power where he has none. Combo of being emasculated and powerless while having distorted views due to alcoholism = jerky, self-centered, not able to consider you, your daughter, and the full picture of what is going on. Honestly, it sounds like you just got a big delivery of hardware from the hardware store (as far as his part in this is concerned). That is pretty much how I would expect a drunk divorced emasculated dad to act and that is just what he did.
