The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well wed night was hell. I went to a meeting and I was so scared and nervous that I would arrive there on time. Since the past 30 days ah became sober . Build this controlling issue that needed to no who and where I was with . He was annualized every thing I did . So after meeting which was running late. I was so flusted that I was going to be late getting home that I got lost.. So lost that even my map quest told me I'm lost. 2 hours it took me to get home when I was really only 10 min away. See my point is when he would drink I could leave and he never ever new I was gone, he was to concern about running out of beer.. So now after all these years I became a different person, new ways finial found my self and only I took care of me. Well to say the next day he said to me . Where your wedding ring as he was rubbing my finger. I stopped wearing it because it doesn't fit any more and he new that. Then my protected my wall I built around him got defensive then the fight begins. So we ended call a emergency session with marrige councler. Glad I went . She gave us tools and boundary s to follow bye till the relationship comes back. I'm final getting the time and space I need to get help me get thru these aftershocks from the earthquake that happen 30 days ago when he put that drink down that distroyed our friendship our marrige our family. I can relate to alot of ppl on here . Granted his disease is working the program and he is feeling better but I need a program and learn to deal with my illness caused by him for years.. I want my friend back my husband , my life for me and the children. So me and kids are going to a Aleon meeting Sunday and get the program I need to help me heal my self . Thank you for letting me share my illness with you and not judge me on my anger I have.
I am so glad that you found that meeting and attended. It is difficult to walk into that first meeting but oh such a very important step.
The difficulty that you described in getting home and in communicating with hubby is so very familiar It is part of the irrational fear,dread and anxiety that we have developed as a result of living with alcoholism. It appears that you also took constructive action to address this as well Good Job.
Your decision to heal and so that your family will again enjoy the friendship and love of the past is a wonderful sign. Keep showing up, putting one foot in front of the other, trusting your new found alanon tools and all will be well
Sharing that journey here is also important Glad you are here.
Way to Work your Program :) That is Wonderful what you have done, big steps and YOU DID IT
I too suffered anixity ALOT when i first started due to my Husband not really understanding WHAT Al-Anon was and his Jealousy of me being anywhere but stuffed up his butt doing my run of the mill Caretaken! NOW... He Schedule things AROUND my Meetings because he Now knows that They are For ME! And My Sanity... I have always left the door open for him to join me, but to him that is Very UN-Manly...lol... But i'm good with that, because I enjoy having that "Safe Place" to Release My Stress & Help others release theirs...
Grateful you meeting helped you line up some boundry's and i respect the fact that you want your best friend back... When I Started Taking care of me, and treating me like a human and not a bystander, My Marriage inproved... Because My Negative attitude turned into possitive energy, and my life took on new life... Al-Anon can do it... As Long as Your willing to do the work, and it sounds as though you are READY :) Happy for you...
KEEP COMING BACK... Congrats again on making that 1st step inside the walls of Al-Anon...So Happy for ya ;)
