The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well my husband is now in rehab for the second time for his alcoholism. He was in a horrible state when they came to get him today.
I should be relieved - but I'm just so sad. I know I didn't cause it, but how sad
To see such destruction. I love him, but I can't do this anymore.
He doesn't really realize that our marriage is over. We will lose the house. Everything he worked for
Is gone because of this disease. I feel horribly sad. Now I have to tell the kids.
2 years ago my exA went to rehab...I told him our marriage was over his 3rd day in detox...I did that for a couple of reasons...1) he couldn't leave there and show up to threaten me and 2) he was safe if he went the suicide route...he had people around him to help him deal with his feelings.
He has never forgiven me for that..(He keeps saying, "who leaves someone over the phone, while they are in detox?" I just answer, "I guess I do") ....but it was a good decision. A hard decision, but a good one. We stayed married in name only, living apart to go through bankruptcy...then we finally divorced. He has lost everything.
I have lost less than I thought I would, and slowly, life is adjusting to a new normal.
Just keep doing the next right thing...one step at a time.
I understand you sense of grief
& loss this is a very hard thing. I too had to tell my exAbf/fiancé I was moving out while he was Locked up. As the other poster mentioned - my exAbf has thrown it up to me on more than one occasion. We have to do what we have to do for our own safety and serenity. An alanon meeting would be excellent for you.. You will realize you are not alone! Prayers and best wishes, think of you and your kiddos first!
I'm so glad to read that you are thinking about an al-anon meeting. You will find lots of support and just like here you will find you are not alone. Hugs p :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
I am so sorry for all of your losses...but you will get through this and you will find peace and contentment, and eventually happiness. My exAH lost a 30 year career-AND a 30 year marriage...he was more upset about losing the career! What does that say? Priorities, prioirities!
Do go to AlAnon..I think everyone should go, even if they have not been affected by alcoholism..it is quite simply a wonderful, serene way to life your life. It takes time and work on your part to incorporate the AlAnon principals into your daily life, but it is so worth the effort.
