The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
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I have to pick up my husband from the airport for his three weeks of holiday. I live in DUrban and he works in Nigeria and I discovered the last time he was home that he's been drinking and whoring all this time while I've been in total ignorance. Once I discovered what was g oing on his behaviour patterns all began to make sense He white knuckles it for 3 weeks till he goes back and is totally awful to have around. I know that I have to love him and detatch myself from the alkie side of him, but I''m so apprehensive of what I'm going to pick up tomorrow, my guts are in a knot. I joined al anon, and they have been fantastic, but I just scared. also hurt that he can screw other women when we made vows before the god of our understanding when we got married, oh h***, I think I just need some encouragement
-- Edited by hotrod on Tuesday 11th of December 2012 03:26:32 PM
Hi, (((((((HUGS))))))))) I hope with your AlAnon meetings that you will keep the focus on YOU!! You don't deserve this. Do what you have to do to keep serenity in yourself. Long distance relationships are hard enough and then to hear that while you have been married, he hasn't. My hubby had a relationship with another woman that he worked with when he was out of town for work. He still won't admit it to me even though his co-workers have told me about it.... and it happened 15 years ago.
Stay busy for these three weeks and stay in REALITY!! Take care of yourself.
(((Hugs))) Just know that we are here and reach out as much as possible during the next 3 weeks. We understand. Enjoy your holiday and try not to worry about what he will be like.
It will help to protect your safety in your interactions with him. Protect your serenity and your physical safety. Your health after he leaves may be compromised as a result of the visit. You are worth protecting! ((hugs))
I collected him - smelling of booze obviously from last night, he's taken up his place on the couch in front of the TV, suggested going to one of our AA group birthday meetings, he at least didn't jump down my throat to say no, but I will continue to go and invite him to join me. not much talking a and as I watch him sleeping on the couch my heart is breaking with a smile on my face. so I say the serenity prayer and am doing it moment by moment let alone one day at a time!
