The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My name is Meagan and I'm trying to improve my relationship with my parents. I am in a dynamics to personal adjustment class that has assigned a self-change project and I chose this as an area of life I would like to change and improve. My mother and father recently divorced largely in part of my mother's alcoholism. I was in hopes to get some answers to some questions:
1.What are the benefits to joining Al-anon?
2.How will it improve my family relationships?
3.What have you found most helpful in your treatment?
4.How big of a role does religion play in the Al-anon process?
5.Can you offer an alternative source for faith other than religion?
6.What makes the program the most successful?
7.Is it helpful or the opposite to bring family members along to meetings?
8.How do you know when the meetings arent necessary anymore?
9.My mother is an alcoholic and her illness affects my entire family how will the program help in this area?
10Is there anything that you should avoid sharing in Al-anon meetings?
Any help would be greatly appreciated
Thank-you,
Meagan
-- Edited by canadianguy on Wednesday 28th of November 2012 12:29:08 PM
Aloha Megan...I'll jump in and this is a only for me alone. I do not and cannot speak for the entire world-wide fellowship of the Al-Anon Family Groups. Please do not tag any information you might find interesting and want to address with anyone else with my name. Anonymity is the spiritual (not religious) foundation of the program.
The benefits for me that came from joining Al-Anon; some of them are learning a better way to live for my own peace of mind and serenity whether there was active alcoholism in my life at a time or not. Currently there is not. Additionally I learned about alcoholism as a disease and how it manifests itself within the live of its victims be they individual or the entire family. I got my sanity back and I learned how, when and where I can manage my own life with or without the help of my Higher Power.
The program impoved my family relationships by helping me change how I acted and responded to my family. In the past my actions, reactions and responses were disease related...controlled and manipulated by the disease itself and in the order of keeping the dysfunction worse or running as it always had. I learned another way of living my life outside of the reaction and inside of my own value systems.
Al-Anon isn't treatment although many treatment programs will recommend it to their participants. In the world of treatment modalities it is considered "Social Model" or one affected person helping another affected person to get better. It is mutual support and we get well from sharing, amoungst other things, Experience Strength and Hope or ESH.
The only part of Al-Anon that I can consider descriptive of religion is how we "live" the 12 steps and 12 traditions...we live them; work them religiously. On the other hand the practice of the Al-Anon program can and has improved the religious practices of many from my own experiences. I've been in the program for over 3 decades.
The program doesn't describe religion outside of how we work the steps...Having a religious affiliation or none is not an issue. Any description of God or a God is "...as we understand God".
What makes it the most successful is the shared experiences of the membership...the shares and stories we bring back to the groups after we have practiced the program.
Many people bring family members to meetings. What they do with it is individual choice again.
The program is life time for me...It will always be necessary especially since I had a habit of living in a way that wasn't working for me or others when alcoholism was ruling my life.
Al-Anon is called the AFG...or the Al-Anon Family Groups...it is made for the family because like you have mentioned, the disease affects everyone it comes into contact with especially in the family.
We don't share about other philosophies, treatments, religions, groups. We speak Al-Anon focused on the program.
Keep visiting the MIP site. Come listen and learn and look for face to face Al-Anon meetings in your area by calling the hotline number in the white pages of your local telephone book.
