The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I believe that f2f groups that have been around awhile all suffer growing/stagnant pains. I have belonged to two different home groups in my 21 years in Missouri Al-anon and both went through this and both were long standing large groups of as many as 20+ per meeting. My current f2f group is actually a "split-off" of my original (first) f2f group that I joined, and was GR for. In this case, the ol'timers from the "core" group moved due to wanting a non-smoking group, and the new group was moved to a church location, from the original AA/Al-anon building. The old group stayed in the original building for awhile with a double-winner as it's chair (which I'm not sure is a conferance appoved thing to do?), meetings now are held in the local library. Anyway, this group went through a significantly turbulent time and survived.
The other home group that I belonged to was kinda associated with a veterinary school started by a Veterinarian AA, affectionaly called the "Vet group". There are several other Al-anon groups in this college town. I was attending graduate school at the time at this university, so this was a logical place for me to land. It too had it's growing pains, but seemed to always put principles of the program first, and it has survived a good 50+ years.
I think trying a new meeting location, and even changing up times, might help. I know my original group, another college town in Missouri, had 3 meetings a week, one on Tuesdays at 7 p.m., Thursdays at 8 p.m. and Saturdays at 8:30 p.m. originally associated with the AA hall. Now the group meets at the local library instead. There was a time of shifting and reoranization after the original split. The Al-Anon Family Group that I currently belong to has found that 6:30 p.m. time works well. So eventually it all worked out for everyone.
Hope these ideas help slogan jim!
-- Edited by Overcome on Wednesday 7th of November 2012 05:02:15 AM
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I can Overcome all things through my HP who strengthens me.
I recently became GR of my group and over the last few months (even prior to me being GR), our membership has gone down. We used to get approximately between 6-8 members regularly. Now, it is the same 3 people that come.
2 weeks ago, one member made a point of making a comment that the reason they dont come often is because it's the same 3 people that share the same stuff. We had a business meeting and one the 3, said they've given themselves a June deadline that if things dont pick-up, they will stop attending. I saw a member tonight at another meeting that hadn't been around in 6 months. I mentioned that our group was getting smaller and they said because it's the same people that share the same stuff, he asked why I still bother going and I said 'it's something to do' he replied 'is that what it's come down to' and was a bit of an arrogant douchebag about it lol
But going back to my first question, how big are your F2F groups that you attend? Has your group ever gotten that small and rebounded?
We discussed in our business meetings the option of switching venues to a brand new church up the road as a way of creating a new vibe. My sponsor said that maybe switching nights to avoid competing meetings could also be an option.
I just hope our meeting doesn't have to close as I really enjoy being GR.
I attend several meetings Some have 4 - 7 members others 30 to 40. The one with the consistently large numbers is the Step and Tradition meeting. Here we share on a step or a tradition each week. We read two readings from the C2C or ODAT. and then everyone has a chance to share . The meeting lasts for an hour and half and every one has a chance to share. This meeting has been going on for over 30 years and in the beginning had only 3 to 4 members for the first year.
I think changing the meeting structure should help. Going to a meeting where everyone shares the same thing each week does not seem to promote growth. I suggest reading from alanon literture and sharing on that topic whould change the meeting to a more constructive growth experience. Have a Business meeting and discuss the posibilities.
I live in a rural area and attend two meetings a week (all that are available). Both of these groups are small. One is in the town I live in and has 4-6 regular attendees the other is about an hour drive away and has 3-4. At times they grow (as much as 15) sometimes they shrink.
Right now both meetings have new comers and this really "fires" the meetings up. When it gets to a point, and it has, where it is the "same X people" week after week, we have done things like Hotrod suggests, changed the meeting up a bit. We have done step meetings and book study meetings.
We are always ready when someone new comes in to fall back to a "newcomers" meeting.
I have attended both of these meetings for 8 1/2 years now. And I look forward to going 99% of the time. That other 1% I go anyway, and I never leave thinking I wasted my time.
Not sure how many meetings are available where you live because of course, that would make a difference. If there are others, perhaps your group could start a "speaker meeting" night once a month or something and invite someone from another group to come speak.
Anyway, thank you for your service to Al-Anon, being GR of your group.
My home group averages 8-12 per week, usually. I've been in meetings as small as 2 and as large as 20...all in the same group. There is an ebb and flow in attendance as people's schedules allow, but by and large we are a pretty consistent and very healthy group that I feel blessed to be a part of.
What concerns me about your post is the stagnation aspect. If the same people are sharing the same things, it sounds like you could benefit from shaking things up...in a good way of course. Perhaps you could propose doing a long-term study at your next GC meeting. There is such a wealth of CAL that could really enrich your meetings if you decide to study it. My home group is a study group that has studied "Paths to Recovery" from beginning to end, taking nine years to go through it the last time.
Another advantage to being a CAL-based study group is that it keeps the Steps, Traditions and Concepts front and center week to week, and that can be some good insurance against devolving into overfocus on members' qualifiers.
I live in a small town and keeping a group going is a big task.
Our group began 34 years ago and died out. #0 years ago is started up and that is when i joined. Being around at this stage was a great experience!
Our group went into recess 8 years ago- no fault of anyone- our local population base changed.
I went to a neighbouring group- I guess I needed full time Alanon.
it took two of us to re-start the local group... we have to allow for any number of people checking it out and passing through... More so with a younger generation.
If we get a new member the groupo culture does this: we have a step 1 meeting. We can do this becos our group is small.
This give maximum time to the new member and gives them a chance to bond.
We have gone from 2 to 3 to five members. We had one member who had a big thing about anonymity. The group is strongly anonymous
but in a small town a car parked in a certain place does tell a tale.
So we put our 12 stepping on hold and gave this member time.
