The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Have been in to read and will start to post but so many changes going on and scattered feelings I don't even know how to start. So, I'll just start typing. I have traded in my car so no more car payment which has been a huge load off of my shoulders. I have removed my name from the utility accounts and told my husband that he is responsble for them since he is living in the house, job or no job. I opened my own private checking account this week. I have filled out an insurance application to buy my own health insurance and am waiting to hear about that. Trying real hard not to have an accident in the week or so before I know whether or not my application is accepted. My parents own a small apartment building and have an apartment that just opened up. It is definitely a big step down from what I am used to but it will be my own and I am excited about it. Since my dad is the landlord, I don't have to sign a lease and I don't have to cough up all of the deposits that normally come with a new rental.
I have a feeling of excitement about my future possibilities and a feeling of control in my plans that I haven't had in a long time. I am now acting and no longer reacting to my husband. I still love him but I no longer want to be with him, drunk or sober. He is the father of my sons and for many years was my best friend. I hope and pray every day for his sobriety and a turnaround in his life. I will do anything I can to help him do that if he asks but if not, I will not live in his craziness and be a witness to it every day.
I still feel sad many days. Today is one. We are starting to make plans for holiday get togethers. We always spent Thanksgiving Day at my Grandmother's house and my husband looked forward to it every year. Even more than I do. It breaks my heart to not invite him but his behavior is too unpredictable.
Still struggling with guilt, anger, resentment, and anxiety. I read my Al Anon literature daily and pop in here often. You all were truly heaven sent and help me more than you will ever know!!
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"Just being there for someone can sometimes bring hope when all seems hopeless." - Dave G Llewellyn
((wornoutmrsfixit))....I dont have any esh apart to say we are with you and wanting the best for you. Its hard not to have sad days, its to me part of the grieving process although excited about the possibilities you have now that you are taking responsibility for your life, its still not the way you had it planned. But your HP has so much good stuff waiting for you.
ODAT all the way.
Take care
Love Simone xx
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What a caterpiller calls the end of the world....God calls a butterfly
It's got to be so hard, and good for you for all the things you are doing to take care of yourself. Thank goodness you have support from family. I hope for the best for you and for your husband.
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It's easy to be graceful until someone steals your cornbread. --Gray Charles
So glad to see an update!! Yes, changes are scary, exciting as well as a rollercoaster ride of emotions. This to shall pass .. it does get better and easier.
Sending you both love and support, it's a difficult journey it's soooo worth it!!
Standing right there with you :)
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Wow, I remember when I first moved out, it was such an emotional roller coaster. It really does get easier and remember to just take it one minute, one hour or one day at a time and only one decision at a time. I am sending you so much love and support!
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
