The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
What's that saying, don't pray for patience, or God will test you?
I've been working and learning to turn my life over to my HP. Guess he decided levelling things was a better way to start, apparently my foundation is shakey LOL. Ok this is "not" funny news, forgive my air of humor but this is always how I approach adversity. Don't worry the real feelings will surface when they are ready and some have and I'm ok with them.
Yesterday, after a couple of rough days waiting, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. First person ever in our entire family history. Not aggressive, best case scenario but still a blow. She is a tough lady like me, I get my fighting spirit and stubbornness from her and LOVE that side of me. In a text this morning after MY doctor appointment, my 67 year old mother texted "no worries, we are tough b***es".. Hahaha!
This morning I learned I have lupus. Well ok as far as auto immune diagnoses go, they suspect so strongly they are treating me for it and calling it that. I had multiple markers in my blood work and several symptoms.
So HP ok what's funnier is... you levelled my playing ground with a disorder that requires lowering stress and relaxing more. THAT's the funny part. I guess years of not taking it seriously were met with "ok fine NOW you have no choice".
I get it and I will hence forth begin learning to "take it easy" "slow down" "rest" and meditate more often.
At least I have an answer and something I can work on to treat this. That's actually a positive after being sick most of this year so severely I nearly went on medical leave. I'm NEVER sick....!
I am so sorry to hear about your troubles. I can understand having a diagnosis is a key thing. The other thing is to know that lupus, like many other disease can go into remissions. I have been around the stress cycle issue many a time. I know my working around the clock really did terrible things to my health. At the same time all I knew at that time was to work around the clock. There will always be stressors in life and certainly those of us in al anon have a tendency to not know how to deal with them. I have got a lot better at setting limits, doing what is in front of me and taking the next right action. There are still some long long tentacles of stuff that are not going to the right action yet but these days I don't beat myself up about it.
I hpe you will find a way to reach out to other people with lupus and learn more in a relaxed way if is possible. Be kind to yourself. Whatever symptoms you have whatever your health history till now the right thing to do is give yourself as much compassion, patience and care as you can manage.
I am hoping to find others to reach out to. I am learning that it's something that seems to turn on and off. I've been pretty symptom free for about a month, but yesterday and today it's back and I know it's from stress so I'm hoping to leave work early today and just relax tonight. Thanks for all the replies, I feel hopeful and I have a very supportive loving family that I am so blessed to have, plus tons of friends.
ASM: I can relate to some of what you said, the pain hasn't gone away for me yet. I am going to the doctor on Monday. I will find out then what is wrong w/ me I hope. It is scary not knowing what it is & what it is called. Someone threw out the word lupus to me not to long ago. I can see you are handling a lot of this w/ humor. I can't say I am there yet.
By the way, when my dad was diagnosed w/ cancer over a year & a half ago, he was the first on his side of our family to have cancer. It took his life last December. I am grateful for the time I had w/ him & his "humor" too.
