The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I went to Al anon many years ago to sober up my alcoholic H I soon found out I was there for my own healing & it worked wonders I was able to make wise calm decisions, not re-act like a crazy person. I was working the 12 steps life was peaceful. I divorced my alcoholic, he totally disappeared out of our lives. I made a good life for myself & my kids. Got them into Ala-teen, everything was great for many years. Until my one son decided to start drinking & after his first drinking party he was hooked he is a full fledged alcoholic. One of my other sons married a alcoholic lady that also has prescription pill problem. I had many wonderful talks with my boys over the years about the disease. I tried to warn both boys, protect them, will we know how that works. Guess what it's like I have not had one day in Al Anon, I got really sick again, started reacting like a crazy person to all put downs, accusations, manipulations, conning & my sons trying to control me into accepting the unacceptable etc. For some reason I find it lot harder to work the program with my adult kids. I am really struggling to get well again, to hang onto serenity & not to react & not to accept the unacceptable. To set boundaries. I am so sick & tired of being sick & tired & so sick of all the insanity in my family. Some days I just want to bury my head in the sand so it will all go away. They say God well not give you more than you can handle. I do know that I hit a new bottom & am at step one again.
I need lots of f to f meetings.
Thank God for this board.
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Icie
"Holding a grudge is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die..."
You and I have had very similar experiences with alanon and alcoholism I stopped going to alanon once my alcoholic husband was in AA. I figured that knew the tools I did not need meetings. This did work for a while and then skip forward a few years. Husband dies from cancer and son , then 16 decides to experiment and I was off and running. It was much harder to detach from a child then a spouse!!! When he crashed and I was walking him to his first AA meeting a women stopped by the reception desk and asked "Where is the Alanon meeting?" That was HPsgentle push. I followed her and have never left.
I need meetings to help break the isolation, I needed the steps, the slogans, the members to stay sane one moment, one day at a time. When I returned to alanon I went to a meeting every day for 2 years. I needed that kind of support. I then reduced it to 3 a week. Right now I am going to 2 a week and I feel supported. We cannot do this alone so please take care of you
Atleast you know how to get there again. I stepped back a bit from my program here recently and I started spinning and forgot I could stop it all very easily, by diving back into my program. I am thinking about finding a new local sponsor and starting the steps over since it has been awhile since I have been able to get to f2f meetings with my hectic schedule (2 kids full time single parent , full time school, 1 occasional job and 1 weekend job.) I know the next 3 years are going to be hard, but I am taking it one day at a time, until i am done with school. It's about progress not perfection and take it easy is another great slogan for when times are tough. Sending you much love and support!
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
Thank you both so very much for the support & understanding.
I never quit Al anon just cut way back on my meeting because of my hectic job & thought I knew how to work the tools. For awhile it worked until all this drama hit again & it made me hit bottom & realize I had lost almost everything I had learned & that I need the support here & at F to F meeting. I need to re-learn the steps & put them into action, with my adult children so I can once again, stop reacting to insanity, find serenity & love myself, be proud of who I am.
Thanks again, there are not enough words to express my appreciation to everyone in this group.
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Icie
"Holding a grudge is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die..."
