The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My hope is that it will get better for me personally. I have been going back & forth w/ being in pain & recognizing why that the pain is getting me very moody. I have been resting--sleeping in a lot lately. Not a sign of depression though. I just need the extra rest lately. I have a lot of time on my hands still. I am glad that I have a place to go like here 3 or 4 times a week. I enjoy reading the posts. I see the die-hard alanons on here that never give up. I am so glad we all haven't given up on recovery.
By the way, I have been treating my AH much better. I have been trying very hard not to put him down anymore. I was really on a roll for awhile--not proud of my actions. I have no right to treat him the way I have. He is a precious child of God & he deserves to be treated that way. WE all deserve to be treated as WE would want to be treated. My hope is for more peace in all our relationships. Even if the alcoholic is still drinking, he/she deserves respect. THAT is MY opinion. Even when my AH was using, I tried to give him some credit for being a human being w/ faults. I had so many moments when I didn't treat him right! I was a raging lunatic anyway! I needed some help just like he did & I was already going to Alanon meetings. The truth is I wasn't working The program. My way wasn't working anymore. I was trying to do it on my own strength. I didn't know that that didn't work.
Now I know better, so I do better! I am not trying to get good, I am trying to get well. So much depends on me & I have to work on me.
We probably can't see the obvious changes because we are in recovery. I have my moments, too. I hope that I treat everyone better. It sounds like have made great strides. Keep reading - progress not perfection.
Kath, I'm with Hotrod also...You're firmly rooted in your recovery now...inspirational to read and imagine. Yes they are Children of God...just like us and none of us perfect and some of us deeply affected by the life threatening disease of alcoholism which we are definitely powerless over. Your letting go of old behaviors for me is major step work and experience. I'm grateful you brought it here. Mahalo Nui. ((((hugs))))
