Moving Update - Al-Anon Family Group

nmike · ~*Service Worker*~

Moving Update

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Dear Nancy

Good Luck in your new position

Thanks for sharing the journey

Jerry F · ~*Service Worker*~

Good on you Nancy M...doubling up on the meetings and keeping the chain saw to top it off...lol Such wonders do exist. I remember the end to my marriage with my alcoholic/addict who had everything we possessed together and almost all of it acquired with my credit and income and in the end my lawyer was flabbergasted when after I was offered the end table, one lamp and a sofa chair and I said lets get it and go home...he told me...now she wants to go to trial. Is this what you were talking about (I had told him about the cunning, powerful and baffling part of the disease)? I said yes and I already have what it is that I need; I came to court with it; (my recovery) so lets go home. Done deal...everything was replaced in time and never gave up the serenity. So you go girl...stay serene and go drop a tree somewhere. ((((hugs)))) smile

david62 · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi (((Nancy))),

Congrats on new job and doubling meetings!

When I got divorced it came down to a couple of wall sconces. I had given her anything she wanted from inside the house up til that point. I knew it was all replaceable and I still had such a hard time saying no to her. Saying no to her taking the sconces felt good. I still have them on the wall as a reminder, even though I hit my head on them on occasion..LOL!!

I am so grateful to have gone through my separation and divorce with the help of Al-Anon. I was told to look at it as a business deal, make the best deal I could and try to keep the emotions out of it. It was hard, but I did pretty well, and today I can look back with no regrets about the way I handled the situation with some class and dignity.

Letting go was hard. But today I know it was the best thing I have ever done for me.

Keep that saw and yourself sharp! smile

David

Breakingfree · ~*Service Worker*~

I gave my exAH everything, the house and everything in it and walked away with my children and all our credit card debt. It was what I felt I had to do to start over and he still complains, there is no winning in divorce or pleasing an A. It was the best thing for me and though I struggle I have my serenity and it has slowly gotten better and easier. I am sending you much love and support!

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

I am so glad to hear from you! Great on all your changes, takes courage.

Hated to hear your dog has cancer, I sure know what you mean. They are always happy to see us.

Hey my AH's last thing was "his" pick up truck he gave our son. idiot. I rarely cuss but I yelled at him,"YOU care more about your f***ing truck than your son. I was visiting him in prison. Have not spoken to him since, got the divorce.

that is that.

sooo my dear I am so glad you kept he chain saw, may I borrow it? lol hugs,debilyn

tiredtonite · Veteran Member

You've really taken a big leap of faith ((((nancy))) You chose to take care of yourself and move on. It's a big adjustment. I moved and made a new start too but first I moved in with my mother. It was a time of transition and I felt stuck in the middle of conflicting worlds - the child I had been, the parent to my parent I was becoming, the ex wife I would soon be and the new single me who that was a mystery. Then there were the daily adjustments to living while going through a very messy divorce. I wasn't under my own roof anymore. I lost my house basically was tossed out into the street and with that I lost all the daily routines, the simple things that made my life my life like where to get the best bagel in the morning, having Alanon meetings available to me all day long in a major city and the nice hello I always got from the doorman down the street. My mom's house didn't feel like it was my house and when I did move I felt lost at first in a new state, new culture with new people. But ya know what? The meetings were the same, less of them here but the same and the people in the rooms are just as wonderful and caring. I use to read our daily readings to my mom at the kitchen table in the morning. She's in her 90s now. I sent her stuff from Forum, she enjoys it. Back when I moved in with her temporarily I read our readings to her because we didn't know how to live with one another after so many years. We're lucky to have our moms still Nancy. Mine doesn't like the reading about the wife who is like a big thumb pressing down on her alcoholic husband. I don't remember what page that on but no doubt it's in odaat. lol Don't worry about your soon to be ex and the chainsaw. Maybe he needs it for his toenails. ;) You're doing fine, nancy. I want to thank you for sharing your recovery with me over the years here in chat. I've always liked you. You deserve the best life has to offer. Hang in there. TT

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