Aloha GTwin and sister...Welcome to the board.  I hope you stick around and listen to the suggestions that will come from this miraculous fellowship and consider following thru on them.  Guilt is a normal emotion that comes with powerlessness until we come to understand the three Cees of Al-Anon.  We didn't Cause the disease, We cannot Control it and We will never Cure it.  Not being able to fix them doesn't mean that you are not trying to.  Your parents have a life threatening disease and it owns them.  You haven't got a chance against Alcoholism other than to join with other family members, spouses, friends and associates and others of alcoholics and addicts as we sit and speak of what it was like then, what we learned in the program and how it is like for us now.   Alcoholism is a progressive disease...if it is not arrested by total abstinence it leads to insanity and death.  The practice of total abstinence is most nearly called sobriety and I pray that for your parents.  Alcoholism is cunning, powerful and baffling and for the family, friends and associates of the alcoholic/addicts the best chance for sanity ourselves is to sit with each other in open Al-Anon Meetings and share our experiences, strengths and hopes and find a power greater than ourselves to rely on as we let go of the problem we didn't cause, cannot control and will not cure.   Keep coming back here...both of you and go look up the hotline number for Al-Anon in the white pages of your local telephone book.  Call that number and find out where and when we get together in your area and then come as quick as you can.  we already have empty chairs waiting.

I was born and raised within the disease of alcoholism and drug addiction my family, friends and associates were all involved as well as myself. My first spouse was an addict and then I went from one addicted relationship to another ending in marrying my last spouse an alcoholic/addict (you do what it is that you understand) before getting into Al-Anon by the grace of God, a power greater than myself.  Today I have my head on somewhat straight, my heart is in the right place, my feelings are level and in pretty good balance and my physical health is very good...I'm taking care of me like I use to take care of the alcoholics and addicts in my life and it feels great.

Keep coming back...glad you are here now.   (((((hugs)))))

Thank you all for replying!

I am really thankful i found alanon. Its good for me to chat with people who know what you are talking about. And know how hard it is. My dad is doing really bad. He got medication to relax and is a sleep constantly. My mom started drinking around two today and probably won't sleep to night. Yesterday i went to sleep with my cell phone in my hand thinking my mom would call to say my dad didn't wake up, because i still drinks with his meds.
My sis talked with my aunt today (who praise the lord is such a support for us) and they (and me of course) are thinking about one last attempt to talk with my parents (when my dad feels better and they are both sober). What do you all think about that?


To inspiredphotography: You are right when you live in the middle of substance abuse you tend to get numb. I think (my case when i lived at home) for self protection. If i had let it get to me then i never finished my studies and things like that. Its when i got to live on my own i started processing things and started to lose that wall i build for my self.
In my home (i don't have children of my own yet, but got beautyfull stephkids) i have the rule, we talk about things, nothing is of limits. You can be you no matter what and if you need help its okay, you don't have to ashamed of it.

That is a problem my parents got to, they are raised with the idea you don't go to someone for help, nobody needs to know whats going on in your home. Thank god i broke that circle.

Thanks again!