The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well, I worked my program pretty good in the face of his latest relapse. He tells me he was just having a bad day (he never admits using) but I know what I know. I have stopped trying to get confessions, it just doesn't work. When I said the other day that I felt like two steps forward, three steps back, someone here made a great comment; that it isn't 3 up 2 back for me, each time this happens I get closer to clarity, I get closer to understanding what I want and how I want to live. That advice was groundbreaking for me. It's true, back in the day I would just endure his episodes and try to survive the night with him, then I made an emergency bag and don't go home when I know he is in the midst, this time I didn't go home and I looked up the name of a divorce attorney. Not that I'm ready to get divorced, but it is within my realm of thought as an option. I have the lawyer's name wrritten down and in my desk at work - it is there if I want it for next time. Perhaps I am progressing towards the inevitable end of our marriage OR perhaps I am just feeling better that now I recognize my options and get thru these things calmer each time, more confident each time and they are less emotionally devasting each time. I love my husband, I don't love his addiction. Thank you all, you are always there to lift me up and keep me sane. :) sg
I'm Glad you came back to update as well... Nothing about this Disease is Easy, but it sure is nice to know there are people that understand, and Learn & Grow with you as you travel such a path...
Marriage is Tough, Even with Alcohol/Drugs isn't a factor... But You are the Only person that knows what is right for you! and I'm Very Grateful you put yourself back on the list of Importance & what is right for your Sanity, and Wellbeing... Good for you! Your Growth, whether you move forward with the Number or find Comfort in it, you are helping Others See that They too have Choices about thier life, and sometimes to me, that is just amazing... Because when i got here, I thought my only Choice was to suck it up and deal with it... I'm Grateful I now have ALL The Choices I Want & Need...
Thanks for Being here, and I will Send Prayers your way for "Ease, Balance & Grace" Keep Coming back....
