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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> when I break it off, he BROKE INTO MY HOUSE!
Post Info TOPIC: when I break it off, he BROKE INTO MY HOUSE!
Julie3310


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when I break it off, he BROKE INTO MY HOUSE!
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so i have some good and bad news......

the day after i wrote this recent post,  he called me from the unknown number and was in a rage. I knew what time it was. he was putting me down saying "everyone has told me no matter what my baby mama will always be here for me" that was a dagger to my heart bc she will take him back anytime. I accepted it and told him i have accepted this and i am happy.

He started saying he needed 20 dollars so bad and was pratically crying. he said he was on my way to my house. I told him NO NO NO! i was pleading i even said i would western union him money bc i did not want to see him at all. He was getting so upset that I have not been wanting to see him. I stopped answering his calls.

I started getting nervous and called my girlfriend to tell her he said he was coming by. 15 minutes later he was knocking at my door. I almost fainted. I live with my parents and I told him i left and my parents were home. I hid in my bathroom with the lights off, He came through my back door and ripped my phone out of his hand. I was screaming and telling him please get out ill give you whatever u want. I grabbed whatever cash i had and ran towards the front door, i ended up getting him out of my house and locked the door behind me, he was pounding at the door and screaming saying "I NEED 20 dollars this isnt enough, take me to the ATM, get in the car" I was screaming for my life. He had my phone and i knew i had to tell my parents because i thought he took my phone. He left and I was dying inside. my parents came home and found my phone outside and they called the cops.

make a long story short I pressed charges, he is pretty much homeless using these people he is staying with (he is probably their drug runner) car and phone. so I dk where he is.

I changed my number and getting a restraining order this week. I am upset because I know im gonna go through the ringer even though i have nothing to lie about. just kinda upset what he will do. I brought fear to my family house and now i get sick to my stomach thinking something can happen again or he could do something again or even do something for pursuing the charges.

I hate myself for bringing my family into this, they didnt know about it and its good i got everything out of my life, the lies to my parents and him. but I feel sooooo relieved its over but soooo stupid and fearful inside. He makes me look at him as a zombie now like who knows if he started using bath salts bc its cheaper but i hate myself. I am going to get help. start meetings more and counseling.

why when i cut it off this had to happen. my parents lost their trust for me, my dad said i am an embarrassment and that i am too nieve. (I am) like how can i lived this life with this guy?? why did it need to come to this???

I dont know. i am in shock and it hits me every so often.



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Chaya


Senior Member

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Posts: 119
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Please be careful. There have been numerous accounts of people experiencing extreme psychosis and bizarre, violent behavior on bath salts.

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Love, Chaya
Jerry F


~*Service Worker*~

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(((((Julie))))) one way to look at this is the process of change.  Even in changing we don't have absolute control.  We do the best with what we have and you have done courage.  Continue on changing for the better for yourself in the future.  Have compassion   - and -   call the cops. That is what I learned to do and what I did.  Sanity coming your way with more practice.   Keep coming back and glad you are okay and not drastically harmed.  Lots of happenings will be forgiven as you change for the better.  (((((hugs)))))smile



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AStrongerMe


~*Service Worker*~

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You aren't responsible for his actions, but you did the right thing pressing charges and going for restraining order. I'm assuming your parents know the details of the problems with him? Just do your best to be safe and worry about that first.

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Debilyn


~*Service Worker*~

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This is a huge crime!!! I hope you make that clear to the authorities and do not allow them to ignore you.

Breaking and entering, assault, attempted kidnapping and more!!!! He needs to be in jail until trial then go to prison!

NOTHING you did caused him to do this, nothing. It's not your fault your parents do not understand. The best thing to do is to stand up for yourself, show you are strong and will not put up with this guys behavior or let him get away with it.

Kidnapping is not an offense to ignore! He was also threatening to steal money from your ATM for petes sake.

I know as  mom if it were my child, well actually it was!! My daughters father of her baby abused her when she was holding her newborn baby! She immediately got away and called 911. I was proud of her for standing up and not allowing him to hurt her or baby again!

The best way to get over this is to empower yourself. Hon please get ahold of someone for an abuse support group. You can call social services to get information. If you want me to help get you the info you need pm me. I am more than happy to guide you. You are a victum and being scared is very natural and good! You know you need to protect yourself.

Also you want to put him away so he does not hurt your parents. Being proactive is so important. This guy went way over major boundaries!!!

I am here if you need help. sincerely! debilyn



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Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

       http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html            Or call: 1-888-4alanon
pinkchip


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 5663
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Julie - Take a deep breath. The problem is not him. The entire answer rests in the few statements you made about hating yourself. Once you work on that, grow some more into the person you want to be... You won't feel the need to settle for people who treat you badly. From all your posts, I never really thought you were naive so much as not happy with yourself.

In my experience, I put up with a world of crap (and I think most of us here did) before I realized I am worth a lot more. I am not dumb - I am not naive - I am not a stupid kid....Just cuz you dad says something doesn't make it true either. What you think about yourself is 99 percent of this.

You do deserve a mature relationship with someone who has their crap together. Prior to that, you can be happy on your own. Believe it!!!

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