The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hi everyone. Im doing some step worksheets from my local CODA website. I have been to 1 mtg in addition to al anon, and am looking forward to trying the steps. The part I am on is listing ways that my life reflects unmanagability. Currentlu working on "spirituality". I have been writing out my struggles w/ the religion of my youth, and my eesulting struggle with having spirituality now. I wont list it all here, but I found MANY WAYS that that religion glorifies and exemplifies codependent behavior. My actual question is this...As I am trying to look at ways that I am responsible for my own misery and breaking thru my denial and stopping finger pointing, I remember how thoroughly ai threw myself into church in order tto gain my parents approval. Of course, as a small child, I had no choice. But as a teen, I didnt exactly have.NO choice, but I did have some choice. Im struggling figuring out how responsible I was for my exposure as a teen. Does that make sense? Any insight? Thank you.
To clarify, I didnt have any choice about attending normal worship times, but I did have a choice about extras. I was also allowed to "change denominations" my sr yr of hs, but I still had to attend something.
Oh for sure! I feel that way as well. I think what Im trying to sort out is how the religion of my youth interfered with my search for my true personal spirituality currently, and what obstacles I put in my own way or which my parents did. If that makes sense?
Aloha CDK...Oksie open the door and very nicely. Besides looking at your normal and historical/habitual perceptions of spirituality try taking a look at it from the angle of motivation. The inside job and command center voice. How are you motivated to look at things and behave and set up your value system. Some of this might be also related to christian history and for me much of it is related to the relationship I have with my ancient God...my ancestral father/creator or Mother/creator. My spirit to love and be loved in return comes from that and then much much more.
Ok, I will try that. I think Im just trying to discover every single way, Ive skrewed up my life. Like super fine tooth comb. I mean really, I was a teenager basically left to my own devices with parents wrapped up in an addict brother. So, I chose extra church activities that made me feel good at the time and got me out of the house. Im beating myself up, arent I? Im good at that. *sigh* Thanks for helping me see that, and for the guidance. Thanks. (hugs back)
I find looking at a sunrise or a sunset one of the most spiritual times of my day.....
The power that is shown at that time is incredible. Sure it could all be explained mathmatically.. and yes it is explained that way... that doesn't detract from the fact that it is amazing to watch.
I find it a moment where serenity is found. There are so many beautiful pictures taken of the sunset or sunrise.... people flock to watch it and savour its moment.
There is spirituality in that. I like to just take it all in. The colours, the wind, the change in temperature. The light change and how it reflects differently. Beautiful time of day. (I prefer the sunset as I like to sleep also hehehehe)
