The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Yesterday I took a day for me because it was my birthday. In years past I lamented long and hard that the ex A did all kinds of cruel stuff on my birthday. He once took one of his friends out on my birthday! In years past the fact I wasn't deluged with cards, presents and more would have been a sign of my self worth and that would have been the only gauge I had.
Actually I didn't tell many people it was my birthday not because I was ignoring it but because I didn't have the opportunity and maybe I wanted to watch for self sabatage because I'm good at asking the wrong people for the right reason.
So yesterday I took a day for me, had my hair cut, took it easy, didn't get irritated by all the small things that snap all my energy most of the time. I took a step back and stopped looking for others to validate me and validated myself.
Of course it was nice to have a small sum to do that with and I haven't always had the opportunity to do that but this day was practice for other times when money isn't the important thing.
Yesterday would have felt like a huge failure to me in the past. Now its just another market in the confusing really step by step actions of self care that I've been so remiss in doing.
Happy Birthday!! I agree what a great way to treat yourself!! Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Happy Birthday! Today is my birthday, we're one day apart, LOL! I am going to lunch with a friend who shares my birthday, except we're going tomorrow. I dragged the family out at 8 AM today for a breakfast birthday for ME. I wanted pancakes from my favorite place and they could either come or stay home, but I was going. I also am planning on getting a pedicure later today, something I don't do very regularly. So glad you did some things for yourself, I am working on not having expectations and my birthday really gives me a chance to put that into action.
I think its true low expectations really help. When people first talked to me about that I was absolutely furious. I wanted my naivete and idealized person. Now I prefer reality !!! Lol
