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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> We'd all be alcoholics if we had this disease
Post Info TOPIC: We'd all be alcoholics if we had this disease
usedtobeanyer


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We'd all be alcoholics if we had this disease
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I've found lately that I'm really becoming more and more comfortable with the concept of alcoholism as a disease. Not that I have ever really had a problem with this idea, but it's just that lately I've been able to really embrace this concept and allow it to help me find the sympathy and understanding that makes things so much easier when dealing with my spouse. 

Anyway, in talking this out in my head, I came to the somewhat obvious realization that the only thing keeping me from being an alcoholic is that I don't have this disease. I've done a lot of impulsive things in my life and turned to a variety of unhealthy pursuits in order to "feel better". Alcohol was one of them and while it provided a momentary diversion and some nice feelings, I never had that reaction or obsession that made me need and want to keep drinking. Because I am not an alcoholic.

I know it sounds silly to say "I'm not an alcoholic because I'm not an alcoholic", but I guess that's what I'm saying. And realizing that helps me to understand so much more what my wife is going through. We all have pain in our lives, and we all use things to distract ourselves and feel better. We usually find the one that works best and do that, over and over. In some cases, it's a good thing, like exercise or reading or religion or whatever. In some cases, it's not a good thing, alcohol included. For those with this disease, it "works" better than anything else. And I guess that's the problem.



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Jerry F


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This is what is called "working it" the doing the work to come to understanding and then another or different perspective which releases a ton of pressure and pain.   Yay for your work and commitment.  ((((hugs)))) smile



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Peachy219


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Thank you for sharing this usedtobeanyer, you articulated a lot of thoughts that I have also been turning around in my head recently. I appreciate the feeling of community and understanding I get from shares like this. It makes me know I am not alone or crazy! Well, at least not as crazy as I feel sometimes!

Have a wonderful day smile



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Michelle814


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It has helped me to think of the disease as emotional and spiritual, underneath, and the compulsion of drinking as a symptom. I have the same disease as my husband; self pity, self consciousness, worry, fear, judgment, jealousy... but I don't have the compulsion of drinking, instead I try to control and change others, focus on others instead of myself, and get into power struggles. This is why I need al-anon. I could have been an alcoholic, easy, if I did not hate hang overs so much. Hahhahahaha.I choose not to drink now and its so amazing and beautiful how much there is to do without it and how many wonderful opportunities have opened up to me now that I'm living a life of spirit.

Just my opinion on the matter, take what you like and leave the rest.

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abbyal


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There is a  wonderful saying in our program . There but for the grace of God go I .  Louise



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pinkchip


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Usedtobe - For me, it worked all the way up until it turned on me and stopped working. At that point it made everything worse, then it turned into a huge nightmare. The worst part of it all was when I knew I had a serious problem and still could not stop.

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Debilyn


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You know I say addict more than alcoholic. Being an addict is the disease. Being an alcoholic is just one substance an addict can be addicted to. You can be a heroin addict, alcoholic, cocaine addict, pot head etc.

Its such a horrible disease. hugs,deb



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Pushka


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Going to open AA meetings have really put things into perspective for me .. and there is such truth to the addiction being just a symptom to deeper things.

Hugs P :)

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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
maryjane


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It is a lot easier to have empathy when you can compare it to any other disease. However, this disease evolves into mental illness, and that is what we have to protect ourselves against. And there is a fair amount of denial (a description of the disease) as to how bad it really is. There is denial on their part and a huge amount of it on MY part. I don't want to admit that I was so screwed up that I chose someone with all this. But I did.

Now I have to protect myself from the mental illness part of the disease. Live and let live.... Let Go and Let God!

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maryjane
orchidlover


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I believe I have my share of problems that have robbed me of a decent life.  What I have to watch is that I can be compassionate for others in a way I am not for myself.  First I have to be "there" for me.

Maresie.  



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orchid lover
Oksie


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My addiction is addicts and drama.
I am working on that.

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callmemara


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Wow. Now that is food for thought......
Michelle814 wrote:

It has helped me to think of the disease as emotional and spiritual, underneath, and the compulsion of drinking as a symptom. I have the same disease as my husband; self pity, self consciousness, worry, fear, judgment, jealousy... but I don't have the compulsion of drinking, instead I try to control and change others, focus on others instead of myself, and get into power struggles.

 

 



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